Chapter 19

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     Hours later, me and Izzy are still talking. We go deep into conversation and I start to cry. I get so emotional. I start to cry. I wipe them away but more just come after. I end up crying for hours. Thinking and thinking. I try to stop but I just can't stop. I try and try so damn hard to make myself stop crying, it's so embarrassing.

    I don't have anyone to talk to about this. I can't talk to Izzy, neither me nor her are ready for a talk like that. It's ok, I am going to be ok. I tell myself realizing it wasn't going to be ok. Not in a million years is what happening "ok" I can't even put in near that category. Ever.

'Izzy, we need to take a break.'
 
    I text Izzy. I can't be with her at this time. I know I am a total douche for doing that over text but I couldn't see her like that again. It pains me so much. I need time to think. Think about if I want to be with her. She is a monster... it hurts to says but it's true. She is a monster. Whatever she is.

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