Today was the day before our wedding and I was super happy. I couldn't wait to marry Bruno. He was the one I wanted forever.
I woke up feeling refreshed, yet sad. I knew I couldn't move forward without Bruno meeting the one person who was most important to me. Mia. Today had to be that day.
I got out of bed and got dressed before walking out to the kitchen to find Bruno fully dressed drinking a cup of coffee and looking at his phone. I pored myself a cup and sat down beside him.
"Good morning." he said putting his phone down. "Howd you sleep?"
"Great." I said. "I'm surprised I even got any sleep considering we're getting married tomorrow. I can't wait to marry you."
"Me too." he said. He put his arm on the top of my chair around me. "So what do you wanna do today before the rehearsal dinner?"
"Well I have an idea of you're open to it. I got up thinking about Mia and how I would do this with you if she was alive and then it got me thinking that you've never met her. So maybe we can take a little time today to visit her. What do you say?"
"I say let's do it." He said.
I smiled at him. I loved the fact that he accepted Mia. Even though she wasn't alive, she was still my daughter and she meant the world to me.
-
We got to the cemetery and found her grave in a few seconds. There were more envelopes there since the last time I had been there. I sat down in front of the stone and Bruno did the same.
"Hi baby girl. It's mommy. Gosh I haven't referred to myself in a long time. I miss you every day. It gets hard sometimes but I think about you all the time. The things youd be saying. The things youd be doing. What youd look like now. What youd be wearing." I said. I wiped a little tear from my eye. "Um, so there's someone special I want you to meet. Mommy found someone who really loves her. And I love him. His name is Bruno. We're getting married tomorrow. I know you would have loved to meet him. He's the love of my life."
"Hey Mia. You should know how much your mom loves you. Ever since She told me about you She has lit up every time she talks about you. Shes a special woman. I'm sure you would have looked just like her." Bruno said.
"Yeah. I'm sure if it too."
I looked over and saw Roman standing a few feet away from us. He had an envelope in his hands. Bruno and I stood up. "Um, Bruno can I have a minute with Katie?" Roman asked.
"Yeah. I'll be in the car." Bruno said before kissing my cheek and walking away.
I put my hands in my pockets and stepped towards him.
"Look, I'm sorry if it upsets you that I brought him here." I said.
"It doesn't. I understand that he would have been in her life if she was alive. Its just hard to let go at times." he said.
"Yeah. Tell me about it. I have all of our old pictures and some times I Look at them and I realize how happy I was back then. How our lives were just starting out and getting to be amazing. And then I realize the heartache that followed." I said. "Sometimes I catch myself trying to find her like she's alive. I can't move forward with Bruno until she knows how much I love her and how no matter what happens with Bruno and I shell always be my baby."
"I'm sure she knows." he said. "I think shed be proud of you."
"Thanks." I said. "So what happened to Galina?"
"Truth be told she couldn't handle the fact that you are my one true love."
"Roman, I don't know if it was that. You and I went through a lot together. We have a bond that nobody will ever be able to break. But at some point you have to move on with your life. You can't be stuck on me forever."
"I know. But every time I try to move on with someone I feel like....." he paused. "I feel like I'm letting her down. Like if I break this one more time our baby girl is gonna be disgusted by me."
"Why haven't you ever told me this was how you felt?" I asked.
"Because deep down I realized that I owed you the chance to be happy. I can't keep taking happiness away from you. God knows I've done enough of that. And I started with her." He started walking away.
"Wait a second." I stopped him by grabbing his arm. "Roman, you know you are not to blame for her death. How could you even think that you are?"
"Because you went out because of me. Because we had that stupid fight. I love with this guilt every day. Of I had just not over reacted about that stupid song then she would still be alive."
"I never knew you felt that way."
"I didn't want you to know."
"Why?" I asked.
"Because I didn't want you to feel obligated to be with me." He said. "I went really dark for a while. And I never told you but I tried many times to kill myself. But I just kept thinking about Mia and how disappointed she would have been in me."
"Roman, I think you and I need to have a serious talk. Maybe once a month we can come out here together. That way we can still feel like our family is whole again."
"Won't that give Bruno the wrong idea?"
"No. He knows that no matter what you and I will always be connected because of Mia. He understands that." I said. "He's really more understanding than you think."
"You really love him, huh?"
"Yeah. I do. But that doesn't mean I don't care about you. I'll always care about you. So please, make sure you go be happy. Whether it's with Galina or someone else. You deserve it too. And your daughter will only care about how happy you are. Both of your daughters."
"Yeah. I can't believe I have two kids."
"Believe it. If anyone I know is a great dad it's you." I said. "You would have been an amazing dad to Mia. I'm sure of it."
"Thanks Katie." he said.
I hugged him. "You know, I was ready to invite you to the rehearsal dinner tonight and the wedding tomorrow. I just don't want you to feel obligated to go."
"Well no. I'd love to. Its my way of taking another step in accepting you and Bruno together. If you want me there I'll be there."
"Really?"
"Yeah. I mean I do remember someone saying we could be still be friends."
"Yeah. I did. And I meant it." I said.
"Good. Come on. Your husband-to-be is waiting for you." he said walking me back to the car. At least we got this all out in the open. Maybe now he could finally move on.
-
I walked out of the bathroom in my rehearsal dinner dress. It was white with 3/4 sleeves and it was all lace and short. I loved it.
Bruno was standing at the mirror finishing up the small details of his outfit. He was wearing black pants, a dark blue button up shirt and a black tie. He looked pretty hot.
He caught me smiling at him through the mirror and turned around.
"What are you looking at smiley?" he asked.
I walked up to him and slid my hands around his shoulders. "I'm just so happy. Do you know how many people get to marry the love of their life? I'm so glad to be one of them."
"Me too." he said.
I pressed my lips to his gently. "Come on. Everybody's waiting on us." I pulled him out of the house and we got in the car heading over to one of the Palm Restaurant in West Hollywood. It was such a beautiful place.
We walked in and there was a long table set up with plates and glasses and a table cloth and it was just gorgeous. Everyone was already there. From my mom to brunos mom to grandparents, siblings, friends. The people that really mattered in our lives were there and I couldn't be happier.
I walked over to my sister, Lily, and my niece and nephew, Blake and Tara. Tara was four and Blake was two. I loved my nieces and nephews. My brother, Darren was there too with his two kids Anna who was three and Kaylynn who was four months. His wife, Brittney was there too.
"Oh my goodness. Look at you guys. You've gotten so big." I said to them. I went over to Kaylynn and took her out of my brother's arms. I held her tightly and just admired her. I wasn't even there for her birth and I hated that. My nieces and nephews meant the world to me and it sucked that I wasn't part of their lives more. "Oh she's so beautiful."
"Can you guys say hi to uncle Bruno?" Darren asked.
"Hi uncle Bruno!" Tara, Anna and Blake said at the same time. They loved Bruno and he loved them.
He smiled and gave them all a hug before taking Kaylynn from me and holding her. That picture was just absolutely amazing.
-
We were in the middle of dinner and I had to make a roast. I just had to. I stood up and dinged my glass catching everyone's attention.
"I'd like to take this time to thank everybody for coming here tonight. It's been a rocky road for Bruno and I but when you find that one person who sees through all of your flaws and loves you through all of your secrets and sees you for who you are, it's the best feeling in the world. And I just wanna say to everyone here that we are so glad that you guys come out to enjoy this with us. You will never know exactly how important all of you are to both of us. And I just wanna say to my amazing husband-to-be, I love you and I cannot wait to walk down that aisle tomorrow and start the first day of the rest of our lives." I said.
Bruno stood up and kissed me once while everyone clapped.
This was the last day that I would be a single woman. Tomorrow I would be married to most amazing man I had ever met in my entire life.
