Million Reasons

Chapter Thirty Six: Magdalena

Dark times, you could always find the bright side
I'm amazed by the things that you would sacrifice
Just to be there for me

Ellie Goulding - Army

To say Maggie looked gorgeous was an understatement. She had always looked beautiful in Antonio's eyes, even first thing in the morning with no makeup and her chestnut hair all over the place. Right now though standing here in the parking garage of the 21st District she looked absolutely unbelievable.

Over the years he had seen her in a number of roles but he had never witnessed her become Magdalena. This was different, it made her different. She'd returned to station twenty minutes ago as a completely different woman. Her glossy, chestnut hair that had once fallen past her shoulders had been trimmed back so that those loose waves of hers tumbled past her jawline. The change was dramatic but he found he liked it. It made her look more dynamic, there was an edge to her now that seemed to have been missing over the past couple of months but it was back with vigor. Her bright blue eyes were sparkling, he didn't know if it was because of her pretty dark eyeliner or from the thrill of the chase. The hunt, he thought, he'd seen this in her before. There was an excitement in their job, a thrill and he understood that more than anyone.

Her dress was one that he had never seen before but he liked the way it looked on her. The delicate black lace looked glorious on her translucent skin as she stood there talking to Atwater. He watched quietly from the doorway as her crimson lips curved into grateful smile. Sometimes watching her was simply enough for Antonio, she was poetry in motion, the way she sashayed in those patent leather spike heels of hers made him want to rush her home to bed. He would give anything to pull her away from all of this but he couldn't. There was so much at risk involved right now. His career, his livelihood and everything he knew was on the line and Maggie would do everything in her power to get him through this. He'd try to change her mind earlier in the locker room but there was a fire in her that he hadn't been able to quench. Her vibrant blue eyes had been raging when he challenged her decision.

The tension was palpable in the locker room as Maggie's furious gaze landed on Antonio. Her petite hands were resting on her hips as he glowered back at her.

"You can not stop me from doing this." Maggie told him, her tone glacial as she spoke. It sent dull knives stabbing into his heart and Antonio he hated it when she did this. They had had fights before in the past but when she shut down like this it drove him literally insane.

He could feel that fear coiling in his stomach as his hands came to rest on her delicate shoulders, his dark eyes were boring into hers so that she could see everything that he was feeling right now and more.

"I can't let you do this for me." Antonio told her, shaking his head venomously. His thumb grazed the apple of her cheek lightly as he cradled her face with his right hand. She was precious to him, she knew that and she had to know that he would never put her in a position like this. He couldn't stand the thought of losing her again, of going back to those dark days where she was simply a hollow of the person that she had once been.

Maggie placed her hand over his gently, holding his warm hand in place before she stepped up to him. It was torturous seeing him like this, torn against his sense of duty to her and himself. She had forgotten how selfless he could be, he would rather lose everything right now than let her walk into the lion's den. Antonio rested his forehead against hers, their lips barely inches apart as the sound of their breathing filled the silence between them. His heart was physically aching inside of his chest as Maggie whispered against his sensuous mouth.

"I can't let her destroy you like this."

Antonio's muscular arms wrapped her lithe body, gathering her up into a loving embrace as he inhaled her sweet floral scent. He needed this right now, he needed her love and her reassurance. Maggie had always been his sanctuary and this time she would be his savior. They stood like that for the longest time, Maggie rubbing soothing circles along the taunt muscles of his back as he pressed a butterfly kiss to her hairline.

"This isn't all on you." she said softly, her thumb trailing over the knots of his spine through his shirt. "Let me share some of the load, this is what I do and I do it well."

"Maggie..." he implored.

"Antonio..." she returned, her voice firm and her tone resolute.

There was no reasoning with her when she was like this. His woman was stubborn and fierce, it was part of her allure even if it did make for turbulent times.

Now he was stood here in the doorway of the garage simply watching her. He didn't blame her would have done the same himself in her situation. He wanted nothing more right now that to whisk her away from all of this but deep down he knew he couldn't.

As a detective he could order her to do his bidding but their relationship had never been about that. They were a partnership and he had faith in her despite the circumstances. he believed in his heart of hearts that she would do everything in her power to come back to him.

Maggie glanced up as he made his way over to her purposely. Over her shoulder Antonio could see Atwater intentionally busying himself as far away as he could out of earshot. He appreciated the other man's reading of the situation, he could trust Kevin to understand that the two of them would need a few minutes before Maggie went under again. He placed his large hands, palms down on the desk of the electronics booth before exhaling deeply. Maggie said nothing, she simply inclined her head towards him waiting for him to speak.

"I hate this." he admitted quietly, his dark eyes betraying every single one of the emotions that riled up deep inside of him. "I hate the fact you have to do this."

"I'll be back before you know it." she told him, a small smile gracing those pretty features of hers. Her palm came to rest on the back of his hand, her fingers entwining with his squeezing tightly. Antonio focused on that fleeting connection before she withdrew, clearing her throat noisily as Halstead appeared next to them.

The other man was clad in an expensive suit, one that Antonio had to have cost more than a month's salary, where it had come from he had no idea but Jay looked the part in it. Just seeing the two of them standing next to one another made him suck in a deep breath and straighten his spine. This was happening and he didn't have to like it but he did have to get on board. Maggie's focus had to be on the mission and not on his misgivings.

"You ready?" Jay asked, his gaze pointedly on Maggie as she nodded her agreement.

"I just gotta grab my purse." she told him, before departing from the group.

"I got her six, man." Jay reassured Antonio, his hand clasping his friend's shoulder as they watched Maggie leave. "She'll have back up the entire time."

"Yea, I know." Antonio said bobbing his head in agreement before twisting towards Jay meeting his baby blue eyes. There was a seriousness to the other man that was rare but Jay expected it. He wasn't surprised when Antonio spoke and he took those words to heart upon hearing them.

"I'm trusting with you with one of the most important people in my life. Just make sure she gets back to me in one piece."