Behind Classroom Doors (student/teacher)

LIX- Understanding

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Shawn's P.O.V.

I watch as Livia leaves with her mom for paint swabs, I think. "Shawn." I shake my head, turning to Dianne.

"Sorry, I was just-"

"Staring at your student? I can tell." Her voice sounds almost amused at the situation. Dianne leans in, "The thing is, if I can tell then so can her parents. So ease up okay?"

"Why even invite me knowing she was going to be here? In fact, why hire her parents?" There are a million other designers, especially in New York.

Not to mention she's been pretending to be nice this whole time. When she first met Livia she had no problem voicing her feelings on the matter. Dianne flips her short hair behind her shoulder, "Did you ever think I did it for you?" What? "I know I haven't really been the best mom to you but I'm trying to make up for it now. You seemed happy with Livia so I thought it would be nice."

I scoff, "You haven't done anything for me unless it benefited you since I was nine. Besides, bringing her here with her family was risky."

"Okay fine I was a bad mom, I get it. Why can't I make up for it now?"

"The very fact that you have to ask is why." I deadpan. "Dianne, you weren't just a bad mom, you weren't a mom."

Dianne leans forward in her seat, I can tell what I said hurt her. "I know...but I'm trying."

Funny that she's trying as soon as she comes into some money. Money that she wouldn't have if it wasn't for me. I can't stay here with her, so I gather all the paperwork and put it back in the folder it came out of. Then I stand up, "It's going to take more than a high-risk trip here with my student and her family. I'll finish these in my room."

"Shawn wait." She tries, but I'm already walking towards the exit.

It doesn't take long for me to find a taxi and make my way back to the hotel. When I do I toss the file on my bed and sit down beside it. It's nothing but busywork, just an excuse to get me here in the first place. It worked, I decided to take two weeks off and help my mom in New York. It almost didn't happen, I'm a new teacher with no vacation time. Then Dianne snapped her fingers and offered a donation to the school. Of course there would be a catch. She only wants to feel better about herself.

I look up at the door that leads to Livia's room. I go over to it, it's still unlocked and opened just a crack. I think she's scared I'll have another bad dream and she'll have to come wake me up again. It hasn't happened again but I understand where she's coming from. I'm worried about her too. Livia feels more than she's willing to admit, I think she just wants so badly to be okay. After what happened with Dean, I can't blame her for needing it to be all behind her. After all, I did the same thing.

I pushed down my feelings and tried to do what I could for Dianne. I thought she needed me but I was the one who needed her. She began to rely so heavily on me that she forgot how to be a mom. That's why I've always been so grateful to have my uncle Mathew. He knew my situation wasn't the best and tried to make my life better. He pushed me to go to college and without him I'd be lost.

If he knew I slept with-not one-but two of my students, he'd kill me. I just keep telling myself that Livia doesn't count. Mostly because I'm in love with her, and because she understands me.

Screw it, I think to myself as I open the door all the way and enter her room. The first thing I notice is her nightstand with a book placed on it. I picked it up, it's a romance novel. The title indicates that it's a spin off of Romeo and Juliet. I set it back down and look at her side of the bed. It isn't made up so the pillow, as well as the sheets, are wrinkled. The kitchen area has a bunch of empty coffee cups, it tells me that she doesn't sleep that much. Maybe only when I'm with her.