A Girl Like Her (STUDXSTUD)

Chapter 3.

Ariel

It's been two weeks and I guess you can say all I've gotten is worse. I'll have random moments where I'll lash out and break anything in my sight, but luckily Monica and Cam had been dropping by to check on me.

Whenever I wasn't throwing a fit, I was feeding Armani or laying on the floor with her in her room watching her attempts to crawl. I loved how her giggles would fill my ears every time I'd tickle her tiny little feet or when I'd make funny faces.

Now that I didn't have Jaie anymore, Armani is where my happiness lies. She's like my world, even though I wasnt the one who has physically given birth to her. But I was her other mama, and just like Jaie felt with her, I felt it too.

Monica knows how much I love Armani, but last week she said she had enough of coming over and seeing me passed out somewhere around the house Armani lied awake and lonely in her crib. She told me that it wasn't good for me to have Armani here with me while I'm like this, because it wasn't fair to her; so Armani is now with Jaie for a few weeks. I have yet to speak to Jaie, and the only way we have been communicating is through Monica. Monica will tell me things I need to know, but she tries to rarely mention her as she sees how bad I get when I hear something that I don't want to hear.

This last week though, I've been going out with random friends to different clubs and places like that. I haven't been getting into "trouble" or sleeping with anyone or anything like that, just been going out and having fun. I'm trying very hard to try and keep my mind off of Jaie. I promised Monica that I would work on my drinking, and no, I haven't stopped completely but I'm also not drunk every single day.

I've met a few people who've taken an interest in me, but I don't have any desire to meet anyone like that. But from what I hear, Jaie is already talking to people and is close to getting in relationships. How do I know? My best friend, cam, is always lurking on something, and sometimes she'll come and report it to me.

Yes, I'm happy that Jaie is becoming happy.. but I'm also unhappy that her happiness isn't with me.

As of now, Monica and I are at the park with our other friend, Chrissy. I'm swinging on the swing and they're both sitting on a bench a few feet away from me on their phones. We're at the park because they don't want me sitting in the house all day long.

"Ari, I think you should go to counciling." Chrissy suggested, and Monica nodded. I made a face and shook my head no.

"I don't need to sit in front of someone that I don't know, and talk to them about how I basically lost myself because my significant other decided to up and leave me out of nowhere. And I don't need to tell another person about the breakdowns I have and about how I can't even have glass in my home anymore because i destroy things- not to mention that I do it while I have a three month old baby girl sleeping in her room." I did a sarcastic laugh and shook my head no once again. "Nah, I'm great."

"Ari you're just being stubborn. I honestly think that it would be good for you to talk to someone who could give you professional help for once. Just go one time and see how it is.. I honestly think it'll help you out."  Chrissy softly sighed as she pulled out her phone. "Here, ill look for one and see if there are any openings today." She smiled while beginning to search I guess.

"I just said I'm not." My face was slowly forming into a frown, and Monica cleared her throat. "You are, okay? Okay."

-

"Hi, my name is Rachel." This lady smiled at me as she held her hand out for me to shake. I reached out and shook it, smiling at her. I guess maybe this wouldn't be so bad.