oh shit finally updated, lol what's y'alls fave colour. i'm a slut for a good yellow
ryan suddenly hated the word 'student'. it gnawed on his bones and tore his skin. the word, especially coming from brendon, made him feel small; insignificant. ryan thought he was more than that to brendon. but the venom that was attached to the word let him know that he was exactly that: a student.
still, the anger lived at the back of his mind, slowly making its way to the front. he sat in english class once again, playing with the pen in his hand trying to distract himself from the way his heart fluttered when mr. urie would so much as glance at him. his body tingled as he felt himself itch for a cigarette, knowing it would calm his anxiety about getting called to stay behind.
surprised to hear someone else's name called to stay, the jealousy in him began to boil. the boy didn't seem surprised as ryan watched the two make eye contact. his eyebrows furrowed. christian, ryans classmate, was another student. brendon could be doing that with all his students. the thought made his body tingle in an unnerving way. the bell rang and ryans curiosity jumped.
he slowly left the class as christian sat at the front of the class, not really caring about what was going to happen. ryan left the classroom but didn't go far. he stayed outside the room so he could talk to him after whatever he was doing with christian. ideas ran through his head, slower than he thought because next thing he knew christian was opening the door to meet his friends that stood across the hall.
ryan stared at the door that stood ajar in front of him. taking a deep breath, he opened the door swiftly before closing it just as fast. "sir?" ryan addressed formally, unaware if there was anyone else in the room. "yes, ryan?" brendon asked slightly annoyed by the brief conversation he had with his other student.
brendon watched his studentexamine the room. before exhaling and continuing with what he came in for, "we gotta talk." he spoke relaxing his shoulders only to tense up again when he saw brendon's eye roll. "not now, ryan" he spoke waking him off. ryan put the binder he held in his hand onto a desk beside him. "b, it's somewhat important." ryan spoke hesitantly. brendon pinched the bridge of his nose, wanting to be alone right now. "ryan, i don't-" ryan cut him off afraid that he wouldn't have the courage to say what he needed to say. "no brendon listen-"
"it's you who isn't listening! are fucking stupid?!" brendon began not noticing the way ryan shied away from him. "i don't want to talk to you!-" he yelled again staring daggers at ryan until he saw the scared expression on his face, tears spilling onto his cheeks barely. he sighed apologetically, "ryan i'm-" before he could even finish his sentence ryan was wiping his cheeks with the sleeve of his oversized hoodie that seemed to constantly slipping off his shoulder, picking up his things and walking out the door. disappearing so quickly brendon almost missed it.
leaning back into his chair with his eyes covered by his palms. "fuck." he whispered to himself
