I spy // Phan

24

It can't be, He thought.

He turned around to see a taller version of his older brother, his dead older brother.

"M-Martyn?", He said quietly.

"Ye-", He stopped, his eyes widening.

Phil looked up and gulped, he shook his head.

"Phil", He said.

"Y-Y-You're dead", Phil whispered back, tears threatening to spill.

Martyn must have seen his eyes gloss over with tears and brought him to a secluded part of the busy building, locking the door behind them.

"You're dead!", He shouted again.

"Shh, Phil, I'm alive, I'm real, I'm not dead"

Then he broke, Phil burst into tears and slid against the wall, his head in his hands, rocking backwards and forwards slightly.

"I'm going mad", He whispered.

He felt arms around him and he looked up to see his brother looking back at him, "I'm real".

"How do I know that?"

"I would punch you but I think that would be a bit rude after not seeing you for all these years", He laughed lightly.

Phil punched him softly, letting a small laugh escape his lips.

"You're real", He whispered, smiling, soon that smile faded, He stood up, "You left us, You left me, you left and you didn't turn back, you never told us you were okay, I didn't have my big brother to walk me to school anymore, no one to tell me my nightmares weren't real!"

*13 years ago*

"It wasn't real, Philly"

"How do I know that?"

Martyn punched him, softly (but it hurt 6-year-old Phil), "Did you feel that?"

"Ow, yes", He pouted.

"And in your dream, did you feel anything, did anything hurt you?"

"Well No, but-"

"Exactly, that means it wasn't real, only real things can hurt you"

"But my pyjamas are wet?", He replied.

"PHILL".

___

"I couldn't come back, I-We had a massive argument"

"About what?, some stupid teenage drama?!"

"No, I- Phil..."

"Tell me! What was so important that you left me all alone"

"You weren't alone, you had mum and dad-"

"At home I did, the first day of high school I cried because I was scared I'd get bullied and then I didn't go for the next two weeks because I didn't want to get detention"
A/N: Haha same..... ;-;

"I could go on but we'd be here all night, now tell me what was so important that you let me suffer through all of that on my own!"

"Fine...", He sighed, "There was this kid, He was the same age as me, he kept making fun of you, you were seven at the time and he was fourteen, I let it happen for a while, they were only petty insults, but once, you were holding hands with your friend, a Boy, I really didnt care that you were but he called you, um, the eff word?..and I-I just hit him...and hit him, over and over...I put him in hospital, Phil"

Phil's eyes widened, "You did that for me?"

"of course, you're my little brother and you were seven"

"Are you homophobic, is that why you got so mad"

"No! God, No, People are allowed to be who they are, love who they want, it's none of my business who someone else loves or what gender they're attracted to, just as long as they're happy"

Phil let out a sigh of relief, a small smile.

"But you didnt have to leave"

"I know...I should have come back but I couldn't face it, I remember it so clearly, you ran up to your room when I started shouting back to Them, I felt so guilty. I tried to protect you but I ended up ruining your life, I'm sorry"

"It's okay... But where did you go?"

"Hmm, I'm going to now explain this through an irrelivent metaphor, Think of it like a book, no, like you're writing a book, on paper, that book Is your life, you can scribble over  things , Rip pages out, your pen can leak ink all over the page, right?, after i ran away I tore the first few chapters out of my story, threw them away, I still knew them chapters were there but I didn't think about them too much, sometimes I wondered if I should put them back, but I didn't, I thought the story would be better without them. The next few chapters I wrote slowly, I saved up money so I could stay out of the bad hotel I was staying in and I brought a small flat, at fourteen, incredible, I know, I got a small job, working in a shop, got a new boss and then new job and I slowly worked up my way to the top, here I am,years later , the rest of my life are empty pages, my pen is tapping it eagerly, not knowing what to write, this is the chapter you come in", He takes a breathe and smiles. 

"Holy shit, no one talks that much"

"I do"

"You were right, you're metaphor was very irrelevant, but it explained it so well, I-I'm so proud of you, I just wished you put them first few chapters back".

"Come here", He held out his arms and they hugged, letting quiet tears fill embrace them.