Secret [Yoonseok]

Chapter 15: Sick of it

        "I'm sorry... I didn't know." Hoseok began to speak after a brief period of silence as he was trying to figure out what to say.

     Another brief period of silence before Yoongi responded.

"I'm tired.... I'm tired of this..."

     Those unexpected words hit Hoseok in the stomach making it hard for him to breath. Fear rose from the ground and trapped him. He wanted to believe those words didn't come out,  that he was hallucinating, he was having a nightmare, this had to be a sick joke.

"W-what do you mean?"

"I'm just tired, Hoseok."

"You want to break up?"

     Silence again overcame the room as Yoongi though of an appropriate response. As soon as he gathered his thoughts he took a deep breath inhaling courage and began to speak," I think we both jumped into something we were not ready for. I'm mostly at fault as I began this whole thing between us and I apologize."

     "You're breaking up with me? Yoongi baby..." Hoseok's voice cracked as the painful lump stuck in his neck made it hard for him to speak. "Please don't do this... Please don't say so such things... Baby."

     Hoseok began to walk closer to Yoongi reaching in for a hug as tears  flowed none stop down his face. Yoongi weakly tried to push him away being unsuccessful. His body was enthralled with warmth making it unbearable for him to hold in his pain.
    
     Yoongi began to cry, grabbing on to Hoseok's shirt never wanting to let go. But was letting go the right thing for them? His cries got louder as did his hug. "I really don't want to let you go! But it may be the right thing to do." he explained in between gasps and hiccups.
    
     "No! It isn't! I want to be with you until death! I don't care if the world doesn't accept it. I don't care of anything I just really want to be with you!" Hoseok whispered as he couldn't scream due to that persistent painful lump in his throat. "Please don't leave me.... " he added.
    
     Hoseok's embrace tightened, since overcame the area. There was no one in the world but each other at the moment. The room was so silent there heartbeats could almost be heard by each other. The warmth they felt made them want to stay like that forever. Without facing the real world.
    
     They knew the members were  waiting for them. They new they had to let go sooner or later. They reluctantly and slowly let go. Yoongi looked up at Hoseok as he smiled with tears rolling down from his red,  puffy eyes and wiped Yoongi's tears away with his thumb.
    
Yoongi smiled, "I love you."
    
     Warmth filled up Hoseok. It wasn't the right moment but Yoongi looked so adorable flashing that gorgeous smile, Hoseok wanted to take him. He wanted to mark him so that everyone knows Yoongi is his. He wanted there bodies to connect but if he did then for sure he would not be able to forget Yoongi. That would push him over the edge and his life completely would belong to Yoongi. No matter what hurt Yoongi might cause him he would still love him. Even if Yoongi gets tired of him, he will not let go.
    
     These thoughts worried Hoseok, before no matter how many girlfriends he had before he never felt as possessive as he did with Yoongi. In fact never in his life has he felt that way. He actually thought he might of had no sex drive since he never felt an urge to be intimate with any of his girlfriends. In fact some of them broke up with him because of that. He never cared about the break up though. Most girls broke up with him because he was reluctant to break up with them, not wanting to hurt their feelings. He really did love them but it was better in his mind of they just remained friends.
    
     After so long he finally found the love of his life, He was not letting go. What if Yoongi didn't want him anymore?
    
     Ahhhhh why do those thoughts still persist? Have I learned nothing?!
    
     The also began to walk to the car almost sprinting. The members began to complain asking why they took do long. While Jungkook and Jimin stayed silent making sure to keep a lot of space between them.

     The whole car ride no one spoke. The air was filled with silence, as today was a day to celebrate and to hurt. The members have become afraid of the silence but willingly drowned in it as to not stir up a problem. The silence was filled with millions unspoken words the members wanted to say but couldn't. They couldn't, some will decide to suffer in silence while others couldn't keep there heads down forever. Those were the people deciding what there next move should be, wondering if they fucked up as they stared at the cars zooming by, as they saw the lights of the city lighting up the roads making the scenery look beautiful but somber.

     Exhausted the members for out of the car as they reached there dorms. They had an early day tomorrow yet it was almost midnight. Jin went to his bedroom to sleep as he was extremely tired, Namjoon also went to take a warm, calming bath, Taehyung went to his bedroom with Jimin and they began to talk. Jimin really needed to talk to someone, he needed someone, his heart was shattered today. Jungkook went to his room, turned the lights off but as hard as he tried he couldn't fall asleep. His heart tightening up and he started gasping for air as tears rolled down his face. He really tried to keep silent,  he didn't want to cause a ruckus right now. The members were to exhausted, they should rest.

     As for Yoonseok they went to Hoseok's room. They were feeling the somber and bitter air as well. They felt their hearts also tighten as they couldn't find a ray of light seeping down at the moment. They were drowning, they needed to do something before they got to far down they couldn't reach the surface.

A/N

Listen to cigarette by offonoff with tablo and miso

You won't regret it 😊