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I blinked at him. Worried Fucking, Yeah I'm worried about her. I cared a lot about Karen. Not knowing where she is or if she's safe gives me anxiety. I looked at Craig's face. The small ember from the cancer stick lit his face. It was completely dark now. The sun having set now leaving the clearing bathed in shadows. A dim light coming from the slowly rising moon.  Which climbed inch by inch across the sky. Craig's eyes shimmered from the two low light sources. His features were grim as usual. Showing no emotion change as he talked. I nodded rubbing my arm "I'm always worried about her. Why is it obvious?" The blue eye boy just chuckled. "Hey! What's so funny about that?" I snapped turning and putting my face in his. He smirked spitting the butt out of his mouth and blowing smoke in my eyes. "Oh shove it Kenny. You need to chill." My eyes squinted as I glared at him. Craig stared back meeting my gaze without blinking. I grit my teeth together backing away from Craig with a huff "Did you at least see her here? Red said she was coming this way." The stoic boy didn't say anything for a while just sat looking at me. His eyes lamely gazing at me. He drew in a breath nodding. "She came her and told me to tell you she's is fine and that there is no need to worry about her." My mouth gaped as I looked at Craig. I opened and closed it trying to think of what to say. He just shook his head. Putting a finger to his lips than to mine. "There is nothing you need to say. Just" He paused "Don't worry about it McCormick." Craig stood up crossing his arms and looking out over the still body of water. I watched as he stood there. My thoughts felt like they were moving through molasses. "I. . . Craig?" He didn't turn to look at me just started walking away. Before pausing a few feet away looking back at me. Shaking his head before leaving me alone on the log. 

Great, now I was alone with my thoughts. I hated thinking. All that was on my mind was him and Karen. Why had she trusted Craig? Craig of all the people? Fuck, I mean he looks nice but not really sure if I'd trust him. He's nice eyes that always seem to shine. The only real way to tell any kind of emotion. Since his voice his monotone. Still not as nice as the small poofy haired boy. Who now probably didn't want much to deal with me. I stared out at the still water that reflected the light of the moon. My head ached as I pulled at my blonde hair. 

I stood and looked around. It was late I should be getting home. Right home. I wish I could be with him. I walked along the side of the pond. Feeling the wet mud squish under my boots. Snow started to fall as I walked. Than I slipped. I didn't see the ice. Great fuck me. I fell side ways landing with a splash in the pond. The cold quickly seeping through my clothes. Now I'll probably get hypothermia. Surprisingly it wasn't deep enough for me to drown though. So I just stood up and waded out of the knee deep water. Cursing as I shivered. A sharp pain jabbed my side. The fuck? I looked down to the pain and saw blood seeping from my parka. "Oh Fuck my ass gently with a chainsaw." I gripped the small knife that stuck out of my side. Staring at the bloodied weapon. "How even? Why?" I sighed which would be quicker drowning or freezing. I looked over at the pond. Still rippling from when I had fallen in. The water splashed as I waded into the icy water. getting to when I was about waist deep in water. My heart started to feel like it was slowing. "Oh might be quicker to drown." I slurred. Walking deeper into the water. "So killing yourselves in a new way?" I drew the knife I still had in my pocket. Taking off my parka. Before laying back in the cold water and looking up to the starry sky. Now just to die. Won't take too long I think. 

I gasped sitting up and coughing up water. Someone talked to me, but it sounded like I was underwater "Kenny? Kenny! You're awake." I turned my head. My whole body felt like I had been left too long in a freezer. A sharper pain jabbed my side. I hissed looking down at the puncture wound in my stomach. "Kenny can you hear me?" Was that Kyle? I looked to the person who had saved me. My gaze was met with dark green eyes, and a face framed by curly red hair. "Kyle?" My voice was hoarse. I wondered if he understood what I said. The shorter boy's eyes were red and he looked like he hadn't gotten any sleep. He hugged me roughly making my wounds hurt more. I didn't move. It hurt too much to do so anyway. Kyle pulled away standing up. "Can you walk?" His words were gentle. I just blinked up at him. Walk? I want to be dead. How come I didn't die last night. "I guess that's a no." He reached down and scooped me up carrying me from the pond I had tried to kill myslef in. 

Kyle walked in to his house ignoring his mother and bringing me to his room. Laying my as gently as possible on his bed. I looked at my hands. They looked bruised and bloodied. Scars and cuts ran along my arms in all directions. The newer cuts were scabbed over with dried blood. I picked at one of them watching as blood came from the wound. I heard Kyle talk next to me "What happened last night Kenny? I was told by Craig you were at Stark's pond when he last checked. I went there and saw you floating in the pond." It still sounded like me ears were filled with water. I shook my head trying to clear the fog that seemed to block my thoughts. "I. . . I was trying to die." I looked over at him. His eyes widened as he listened to me. "I'm surprised it didn't work." Kyle sputtered looking to find words to say. His sucked in a breath. Pulling at his dark red hair. "I'm going to check your wounds and make sure they don't get infected." I nodded. He left the room returning with a first aid kit and sitting next to me on the bed. His green eyes looked any where but me "Could you take off all but you underwear?" I shivered my face feeling warm. I did what I was asked. My eyes looked over the scars and other marks on my body. Kyle took my clothes and put them aside. He looked at my wounds cleaning them as he went. Than he paused sitting up and meeting my gaze. Once he was done the smaller boy put the first aid away. He rummaged through his clothes giving my some to wear. I put them on and winced as the fabric grazed my wounds. "Thanks Kyle." He just nodded sitting next to me on the bed. "I couldn't just let you stay there hurt." I pulled on the sleeves of the shirt Kyle had let me wear taking in the smell "Didn't know you cared about me." He frowned "Why wouldn't I care about you? You're my friend. Just because I was upset doesn't mean I stopped caring." 

After that we just sat there quietly. I still felt cold. My body had a strange dull ache. I turned to Kyle pushing my fingers together. "Could I. . . We warm up. . or." I stuttered my face heating up. He just nodded getting closer to me and wrapping the blanket around us. I leaned against him. His body tensed hesitantly relaxing and resting his head on mine. The sound of water had left my ears and it had become easier to hear. "Why were you trying to kill yourself Kenny?" his voice was barely above a whisper. He sounded strained. "It's a long story. I'm not sure you remember. Well I've died a lot and every time I wake up in normal clothes at home in bed. Nobody ever remembers me dying and I wake up without wounds. So I just thought it would be easier than waiting for my wounds to heal." I paused looking to Kyle's face. He was looking out the window. "What if I said I do remember you dying? At least once?"  his words shocked me. I sat up moving to face him. "You. . you remember me dying? When? How? I. . " His eyes met mine "Just the other day. You got hit by a car. I was shocked because the next day nobody remembered, but you were there again at school." He choked on a sob covering his face. "I tried to talk about it but everybody just shrugged me off." I stared at him. He remembered me dying. 

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