The Bride

16. Breaking down

Arnav sat down on the pavement ,keeping his head between his hands.he is losing ,turning into a failure that everyone said he was. He has just gotten out after talking with another labour head ,who has clearly negated his proposition to work for him. Almost all jobs are full with people and no one wants a kid who wants to work few days and take few days off for study. Everyone wanted a full time worker and he can't do that. All the workplaces are far away.

Arnav took few deep breaths trying to control his emotions, closed his eyes to make the wetness in his eyes go away. How he is going to survive , how he will provide khushi with basic necessities. Even his landlady has told them to clear the room in next week ,as her daughter’s wedding is near and she will that room.

No job.no money. No food.no place to stay.

Arnav can't stop from letting a cry escape his lips.he just wants to feel safe and protected. He just wants to lie in his mother’s lap and cry. He has lost . he can't survive alone, he is nothing without his family's name , a plain nothing. His exam is nearing and he is yet to buy a few books and actually study them.

Last few days has been very stressful ,he has traveled to various cities to find job with zero success and spending half of his savings.he has been abnormally silent theses days because he knew if he said even an extra words in khushi’s vicinity he will break down.arnav whipped the tears and take small breaths trying to control the sob that wants to make its way out.a pained cry left his lips still, making him fall to the ground. How they will survive with a little money they have. He don't have enough to buy food for the next week.

He is feeling so alone.

------------------------------

Khushi jumped  to answer the door on the first knock. Its evening and finally after waiting whole day her husband is back. He has been really silent these days but he has never much of talker anyway. Khushi has felt a little sad on seeing him so deep in his thoughts all the time. He looks as if he has grown ten times in all these days.she has tried asking him what was wrong but he has always negated his questions and shooed her away. He said ‘he is handling it.’

Khushi has felt him drowning in  the worry  day by day, she knew he was worried about money . she is mature now she understands .he worries about her ,about himself. She is not going to make him feel sad all day now. He need to cheer up and smile. No matter happen ,what matter is they are together.

“Welcome home ji”  khushi said in her cheery mood.

Arnav just moved past her and sat down on bed not replaying her.

“You did not bought jalebi?” khushi asked perplexed to see without her favourite sweets. She has especially reminded him  again and again yesterday. It has been so long she has eaten something sweet. In that moment she was not mature girl but again that small kid whose wish was not granted. Getting only arnav’s silence in return for her big and important query , khushi dared to ask again.

“Where is my jalebi?”

“Why you did not bought it”

“Ji! I want to eat jalebi”

Seeing her getting angry, arnav tried to calm her down.

“I am sorry , i forgot. I will buy you tomorrow” his face still covered in extreme worry.khushi has been really supportive in whatever way she can in last few days. Eating two times a day with barely anything other than few spoons of chutney.but he know she is still kid and her heart want some things without caring about the factors that affect that decision or the circumstance they surviving in.