The Bride

18.finding you part 2

As your guilt start to rule your mind ,you find every door closing you . you start to hate yourself to the level that you start to lose the sense of what are you doing ,where you are going. When you start to lose all your hopes and see no way to come out of the darkness you have fell into is the moment when new rays of sun falls over you and that's the moment you think , god has forgiven me.
Arnav stood in front of the open verandah of mughlai
style build old house. This was one of last
village on the route where khushi with the mysterious lady might be staying. This is it. His mind goes
back to the time from where he got all the clues to reach here to the fortress of jannat
begam, his heart is still beating at rocket pace just thinking about the
well being of khushi and praying she is alright.

Vivek’s uncle ‘s friend has been the conductor of the bus in which khushi travelled one and half weeks back. He told arnav how the teenage girl was continuously crying and she didn’t answered when he asked about her destination. The lady in burkha besides her paid for her ticket to manpura . his uncle has thought the girl was with the lady and has the matter go as children cry all the time because of some reason or other.
Arnav and vivek has than set off to manpura searching for khushi but to their disappointment she was not there and there are seven small surrounding villages around it ,where there is no bus services so people from those villages also use this villages’s bus facilities. The next day they had travelled to two more villages near it from where they found some ground breaking evidence.
Some people has seen khushi with a lady of same description given by vivek’s uncle ,she has stopped by to buy some grocery from the shop in vabri village . the shopkeeper has told that she not his usual customer but some muslims in right part of the village must know her. This lead them to Rahat ahmed ,the proclaimed leader of Muslim population in the sister villages of manpura . he told them about jannat begam who lives in outer part of the village Narori . he told that part of the village is shunned by their elders from long back for the reason unknown to them. The women probably is evil incarnated or is invested in doing black magic which they abhor .
Only he know how he has stopped from losing his sanity with the thought of hurting khushi to this immense level by that women. All the bad thoughts has ruled has mined all day , they had continued their journey after a night stay at Rahat ahmed ‘s house . he has also offered to send his two sons with them so that they can help getting arnav’s wife safely from the clutches of the supposed bad women. Arnav has denied the offer , it is his fight ,he don’t want anyone else to get hurt . his belief in superstitions is not high but still being precautious is good . more than that he is worried about if he has unknowingly pushed khushi in flesh trade . even the thought of her being part of something so horrible sent chill to his body. He just hope he has not destroyed a innocent forever.

Arnav took a deep breath and knocked on the door that holds his fate. Door opened after few more knock. He has come alone because its his fight, his redemption. A girl of same age as him opened the door with a little caution and looked at him suspiciously.
“who are you?” the girl asked him still in her defensive mode ,as if ready to bang a stick on his head if necessary .
“i want to meet jannat begam.” Arnav replied controlling his urge to forcefully enter the house.
“why? Who are you?” girl looked at him with more anger now.
Before arnav can answer , he heard another girl’s voice.
“myhra abbi , is it naveen bhai ? he said he will be bringing new clothes for us for the eid .”
Another girl younger than him came and pull her head through the small space that girl myhra has opened and looked at him smiling.
“this not naveen bhai. But does he send you to bring us new dresses .but you don’t have anything in your hand. Why are you empty handed.” The small girl continued in her monologue not giving arnav any chance to say something.
Myhra almost forced the little girl to go back inside before saying “jannat begam is not here right now .come some other time” and shut the door on arnav’s shocked face.
Arnav now knocked with more force . he is losing the small amount of patience he have.after another fifteen minute ,myhra opened the door and looked at him with same anger as him.
“i told you to go away,didn’t i” myhra said annoyed.
“i need to meet..”
“she is not here .ok! go now.”
Losing his patience arnav threatened the girl.
“look girl ! i need to come inside and have a talk with jannat begam. Either you let me come in nicely or i will break this door and come. Do you understand!”
“are you going or i need to break your head to make you leave.” Myhra replied
“ah! Myhra abbi . we should not speak ill or threaten anyone during Ramadan” the little girl voice came from behind her.myhra gave her a strong stare and looked angrily at arnav again.
Arnav calmed himself down and came to the point .
“see , i am looking for my wife. Someone told me she is here . her name is khushi. She.."”
Before arnav can continue further he saw myhra turn as big as saucer and her mouth formed in big O and the little girl ran back into the house screaming.
Without a second myhra shut the door and lynched the lock too while arnav stood confused , shocked and angry at the same time. From their reaction he was sure that khushi is in there. But they won't let him take her away easily .
He banged on the door again and again with more strength. He tried to break the door but who was he kidding , it was not some simple wooden door but a strong double plated door made with the strongest of wood.
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Khushi kept on looking at the back garden where everyone was busy , some girls below her age were busy playing ,some of her age and above were busy doing the daily chores. She does not feel like doing anything anymore. It has been more than one week she has been here but still her heart is sad as ever. She was not in her good mind when , jannat bua has brought her here ,in her safe haven for the lost soul as khushi . for the first two- three days she just cried and slept , even after continuous cajoling from jannat bua she did not eat or drink properly. She was more disappointed at her fate than being angry at arnav .
Slowly every girl in this house started to talk to her and try to cheer her up with sometime stupid mimicry or games. She did end up laughing when myhra and zubina were trying to sing and dance at the same time making it look like a comedy show rather than singing with their sweet fights in between. She has found home with these girls who are so different to each other in various ways but are still joined by one thing ‘their fate’ . some are orphaned ,some disowned by their families for being a girl,some victims of domestic abuse ,some just lost. Jannat bua is one among all these girls too, she has faced something just like them or maybe much worse but that horrible past has made her stronger not only for her but for others. She build this safe heaven against all opposition . a place where broken hearts can, broken families can be remade, a homeless can find home.
After initial sadness she has found a way to make her feel less burdened and guilty. She has told everyone about her story just as they had told their’s to her. She told how her cruel husband has run away again and again leaving her to face the troubles alone.
“Why marry if he can't take the responsibility ,such a coward!” rohana has said in response to her story.
Khushi told them how he hurts her and how cruel like shaitan he is . her description were not accurate or complete. She just gave brief of her story and poured all her heart to tell how much his actions have hurt her. Maybe more she made arnav the villain in her story the more she felt unburdened by the guilt ,no matter how temporary. Somewhere she knows she shouldn't have runaway. She has seen her parents fight worse than that she and arnav did but they still never left each other, they came back together at the end of the day. With everyday she has become more sad from within as she realized that she will never see her family again or arnav . he must have already forgotten about her , this thought made her more sad.
This is her home now , but even after all the love that people have showered over her here she still felt alone. Even trying to hate her husband to infinity and beyond has not helped her.she is not even sure why she is feeling this, how can she miss a man that hurt her ,scream at her. But their small little moments of friendship when they were in raizada house make her question her own actions and story. Has she behaved stupidity , but she has waited so long for him to come find her but he didn't . he don't deserve her just like myhra said.

Her thoughts has come to an abrupt halt as she saw little zubina come running inside screaming at the top her voice ,followed by a pale looking myhra who looked at khushi with a look of fear. Khushi run to her and asked what happened . almost all the girls of there little sanctuary come running to them.
“What happened zubina and myhra?” jannat begam asked them while hugging little zubina in her arms who was still crying in fear.
Myhra still kept looking at khushi with sadness in her eyes. Before she can answer ,zubina did.
“He is here , shaitan! Is here.”
Jannat begam patted zubina’s head still trying to decipher what does she meant.
“Khushi’s evil husband is here.” myhra said calmly trying not to scare khushi.
Khushi looked shocked at her and the minute realization come to her . she ran towards the gate followed by myhra who tried to stop her.
“He will hurt you khushi,don't go there.we will protect you don't worry”
Khushi kept on running bear feet through the extended garden that leads to the main gate .her eyes cried and her beat beat fast as train. She was supposed to be angry, she should be running away not towards. In her most craziest thoughts she has imagined him finding her by hook or crook. In the deepest part of her heart she has wanted him to come to her and take her away. She has imagined him walking these doors and just hug her and say everything will be okay. She has tried to make him a villain in her mind and in front of others hoping that it will make her easy to forget him and move on but it all did is increased the ache in her heart.

Khushi opened the door sobbing uncontrollably and to just jump in arms of her husband but all she found is empty street .
No one was there. No one.
He is not here.where he went.
Khushi went outside and tried to find him here and there but he was gone ,was he even there.
Myhra hugged khushi and tried to calm her down.
“He is gone. You are safe.”
“No” khushi just cried . no is she is not safe without him.
He left her again.