explicit content ➵ royce

Ch. III - Awaits.

[ Jay. ]

“Oh my gosh Justice, he was just so… ugh,” I sighed as I’m blandly laying on my couch, facing the ceiling. “Adorable… in every freakin’ way. But I don’t mean to have these types of feelings towards him.”

“Once again Jacob, you are in LOVE,” Justice used a form of enthusiasm to describe.

“Blah! Shut up!” I interjected as I covered my ears. “Don’t say that word anymore.”

There’s something about the term love that despises me. Whenever love reach my way, it doesn’t turn out successful like I thought. Obviously, I don’t have a list of typical standard requirements that I’m looking for in a mate that we could share our souls with. All that matters is the dauntless love and affection. I’m no close on looking for a relationship that all it’s fulfilled with teary eyes (unless it’s lively), sonant lies, and fractured hearts. So love that’s interferes bullshit only makes the Devil happy.

Basically, I want a relationship that’ll work out perfectly and keeps me smiling. I’m over the teenage love so I wanna get boldly serious because I’m an adult for once. But I still don’t know am I ready for something like that. I’m afraid to expose everything about me. Everything as in my profession. I’m not sure can porn stars can get the proper love. If you know what I mean. I only want my mate to focus on cuddling instead of fucking.

“Since it’s thirty minutes from nine, he suppose to be calling,” I muttered as I’m pressing the standby button that’s on top of my phone. Found out, my phone is still dry as shit. No notifications from any other apps that’s installed on this thing.

“Well why don’t you call him fir—”

“—Ain’t,” I disavowed.

“Why not?”

“Because…” I trailed off.

“If you wanna go with Chresanto, making the first move will be the only choice,” Justice asserted on a serious note.

“Okay, now you’re making it harder than I thought,” I said, feeling quite unsure with that opportunity. “What if he don’t answer me?”

“That’s one of the main shit why you stay single,” Justice retorted. “You’re always insecure at every little single thing. Aren’t you s’pose to be the grown up here?”

Maybe she’s right. Ever since I’ve turned twenty-one, I didn’t feel any difference. Now when someone intentionally repudiate me, I have to return the dismissal. But that don’t seem easy as it sounds.

“Alright, I'll call him,” I sighed, really don’t feel like being the first one to call Chresanto. I pressed the home button on my phone. Before I unlocked my device, I glance at the top right of my screen. “Great, my battery is now sitting on nineteen.” I lied.