A Kiss and I Will Surrender

I Can't

Frank gently ran his fingers through Gerard's hair as he hummed softly, they were both lying awake but neither of them wanted to get out of bed. It was still raining from the giant storm the night before and soft rumbles of thunder could be heard faintly. Linda had left a note again saying that they had all gone to the shops to restock so they'd only be back much later, and Gerard and Frank were very happy they could be alone.

Frank slid his other hand down Gerard's side and paused.

"Do you mind if I touch your hips?" Frank asked, not wanting a repeat of what happened in the bathtub.

"Okay." Gerard said a little too quickly.

"No, I want to know that you're completely fine with it, not just 'okay'." Frank said, cupping Gerard's cheeks with his hands.

Gerard looked like he was thinking about something as he bit his lip unconsciously.

"Frank, do I turn you on in any way?" Gerard asked, turning to face Frank.

Frank raised one of his eyebrows. "Of course, everything about you is fucking sexy as hell."

"But I'm chubby." Gerard looked down, a frown on his lips.

"Babe, your chub is the sexiest thing in the world. It gives me something to hold onto while I'm kissing you and when I cuddle you it's like I'm cuddling a soft teddy bear. I love your chub." Frank said, slipping his hands under Gerard's sweater and squeezing the chubby hips.

Gerard giggled softly but then looked deep in thought as he tilted his head to the side slightly.

"Frank-" Gerard whispered.

"Yeah, what's up?" Frank asked, stroking Gerard's sides.

"-I want you to take my virginity."

Frank's mouth went dry and he instinctively gripped into Gerard's hips in shock. Gerard was actually asking him to have sex with him for his first time, this was a big deal.

Frank had had his fair share of sexual experiences but it didn't mean much to him. This was Gerard, a boy he loved more than the world despite not knowing him for the longest time, wanting to give up his first time to Frank. It was daunting enough to think of Gerard being completely naked, and knowing that he'd be Gerard's first was even scarier.

But there was so much that could go wrong, Gerard could freak out all of a sudden or the family members would find out and not be happy about it or it could mess up their relationship. Frank didn't want Gerard to feel like they had to have sex to prove they loved each other.

"I can't." Was all Frank managed to utter out.

"So you don't love me, I see." Gerard said, pushing Frank away and trying to rush out of the bed but Frank grabbed his arm to stop him.

"Gerard, I don't want to have sex with you-"

"I get it, I'm too ugly." Gerard said, wriggling out of Frank's grip and running the door but Frank was too quick and he jumped in front of the door and blocked the way.

"Let me leave!" Gerard yelled, his hands on his hips.

"You need to hear me out first Gerard-" Frank said. Gerard didn't listen and tried to hit Frank's arms away but Frank just grabbed Gerard's wrists and spun him around so that he had Gerard pressed up against the door.

"Frank! Let go of me!" Gerard shouted at the top of his lungs, struggling to get free.

Frank let go of Gerard's wrists and raised his arms high to show he meant no harm. Gerard held on to his own wrists, giving Frank a scared look.