Always - Everlark Fanfic

Chapter 22 - Peeta's Ending

I never thought I would lose her, the girl that I love, the girl I would die for.

Well that never happened, did it!?

I sleep all day, at night I pick up pieces of my life I never thought about, and I try to puzzle together what happened. The only problem is that I never figure it out.

Maybe I was too crazed, I should've been there. I should've.

But some nights I believe I shouldn't have, this happened for a reason.

A reason.

For whatever reason; I have no idea, and I'd like to find out who came up with that crap idea.

I don't know what happened to all my friends, they are getting older and all I ever feel is pain. I'm sure they call but I don't have a phone.

Always

It rings in my head more than once.

Was always the proper word? I don't know.

But what I do know is that Katniss wanted it, and I did it for her. She is forever with me; sometimes I forget that and those are the moments I get mad.

Her funeral was hard, it was one of those things Katniss hated. She tried to avoid funerals, and I know for a fact she didn't want one. I didn't organise it though.

The whole time I just sat and watched; I couldn't stand letting her down again, following everyone's rules. Because she hated that too. Probably why she was a rebel in school.

I smile.

Through time it gets better for me. I spend my life alone because I would never be able to date someone else. I do start to get closer with my friends, and that's when they can help me more than ever.

Finnick and Annie have a child. Finnick says I can be it's Uncle. He's only 1 but he's adorable. He loves me. At first it was hard, because I thought about what it would be like if Katniss and I had a child, even if she was hesitant to have one too quickly, maybe in time she would do it.

For me.

Or her.

It was up to her, though, I would've loved her for the rest of my life.

Most days I still think about her, obviously. I don't cry though. I just smile at memories because it feels better to look back at the days we were so oblivious to anything but each other.

I get older, but not too much, before I call my father. The conversation is short but sweet.

"Dad?"

"Peeta? Is that you?"

"It's me, dad, it's me."

"Peeta. Oh my, I can't believe it's you, Peeta."

"It's me, dad. I've missed you."

"I've missed you too. Oh, how are you!?"

"I'm alright, dad. How are you?"

"I'm not bad myself son! How's your beautiful lady?"

"Katniss?  I don't really know. But I think she's good, dad. I think she's good."

"That's great son! She is very lucky."

"I don't think so. I think I'm the lucky one."

"I think you're both just fine."

"Thanks, dad. But if there is something I have to confess..."

"No son. Let's not get into detail, it's alright. I love you too much to steer into that conversation."

"Thanks dad."

"Son, I better go. I hope to catch up soon. Don't avoid me too much, I may be old but I'm not scary."

"Haha, alright dad."

That was my last phonecall. I was smiling pretty much the whole time.

Maybe my life has had some pretty rough times, but I learnt to fight back like Katniss.

She is home too. She is with her family.

One day I'll find her and the cycle will go on.

I love her and that will never change. I remember when she tripped over in the rain and twisted her ankle when we were kids. I picked her up in my arms and walked all the way to her house, the whole way.

We were about 10 and 11 and we said I love you quite a few times but in a friendly way, but when she said it to me this time in my arms something in her voice was different. It was passionate, like she really felt it.

"I love you, Peeta." She whispered into my shirt.

I tried to look down at her without dropping her.

"I love you too." I whispered, in the same tone.

Then she did something I didn't expect and kissed my cheek. I turned bright red and nearly fell over. It was a pretty big deal back then.

But she was even more red than me. I smiled. I never thought she would ever tell me she loved me and kiss my lips when I was older, even if she cared about me.

I still carried her all the way back to her house. I put her in bed after her mother fixed her up and she took my hand after I'd tucked her in.

She asked me if I would read her a story, to help her through the pain. I agreed without hesitation. I took a book from the bookshelf and read it to her, sitting on the edge next to her.

I don't remember what it was, probably some of her fathers classics. I saw her drifting off and I kissed her forehead before walking out. I kind of ran out quietly after that, because I could feel my cheeks burning.

So I still have those memories of me and her, that will never change. I live happily, I live fully and most of all I live with love.

I will never forget her, Katniss Everdeen.

I will never forget the girl who nearly had my last name and who always had my love.

I look at that ring, even now. I fumble with it in my fingers, staring at it's flower that comes out to me. It's silver circle that could've been around her finger,

but never got that chance.

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Hey so this was kind of a bonus chapter, just to show you what happened after Katniss's death.

It's not that interesting but it shows a lot! I hope you've enjoyed my story.

Love you all. <3

 (Also, while I have your attention. I have deleted my newest story and have started a Joshifer Fanfiction called A Different Love. Go check it out :).)