Supernatural Oneshots

Twelve-> Life Lessons

Dean was never meant to be a soldier. He became one anyway, but Mary would never have let it happen had she lived through the fire that destroyed the lives of the Winchester household. Despite the original plan for his childhood, involving toys, fun, and more love than he'd know what to do with, Dean had been a last thought in John Winchester's mind the minute he found the female Winchester on the ceiling of Sam's nursery. No, Dean wasn't even a second thought. After all, Sam always came before him.

Always, look after Sam. Never, are you okay, Dean? Not once a, hey, you need some more money? Not even a simple, proud of you, kid. John didn't think to ask or say any of those things.

"Sam okay?"

"Yeah-"

"Good. Keep taking care of him. Bye, Dean, talk to you soon." And the last part never really was true.

Dean had learned to do many things. He could change diapers at the age of six. He read about potty training Sam a few months later. At nine, he began making more than mac n' cheese for his little brother. He learned how to hustle pool when he turned ten. When he was twelve, he figured out how to get Sam to talk to him after a bad day at school. And during the teenage years, even when he complained about him, Dean always made sure Sam knew he was loved. He was the grunt, always would be. Sam was not. Sam was the baby, the one who had a halfway decent childhood. Dean had given his all for that kid, way more than John had done for him after Mary's death.

What had John given him? A lifetime, genuine fear of the dark after trying to train him to be buried alive. He'd provided his son so graciously with a scar from learning to shoot a gun. He'd been forced to settle down somewhere after Dean got worms from being told to choke down a half-cooked squirrel, "like the army eats." Dean had suffered nightmares from his father's relentless 'education' about the things that went bump in the night. John hadn't given him a chance to be a kid, he'd forced a parenting role on the poor guy.

Dean was never supposed to be a soldier.