Weak (BoyXBoy)

Chapter Six; Spoons

*** WARNING, THIS CHAPTER HAS VERY VIVID, GRAPHIC SEX. READ AT YOUR OWN RISK***

~ Abel*~

So, uh, hi, I guess.

My name is Abel.

I like long walks on the beach and cigarettes after sex.

I'm uh, a Sagittarius... My favorite color is blue... That's enough about me, right?

I'm not too good at these things.

Anyway, currently, I sat on the floor of my room beside the window, a cigarette between my teeth and I was eagerly watching the driveway. I dragged a hand through my hair, lost in my own thoughts.

Growing up, I was a very simple child.

I knew right from wrong; I knew good from bad, but although I saw things in such a simple kind of way, I was also very big on the whole 'to each his own' kind of deal. I always believed that everyone deserves to live their life the way that they want to live it. They can do whatever they want; that ain't my business.

I've never liked the people who judged others based on how they look or how they dressed.

Maybe it's because of the way I grew up, you know? My mom is an immigrant; I live in a crummy, run down neighborhood, no father, and hell, I dress like a bum. But I couldn't help it. We couldn't afford the nice clothes or the nice home or really anything else. Those were just the cards that we were dealt. We're forced to deal with them whether we like it or not.

Don't get me wrong, I'm grateful for my mother. No, we don't have a lot of money, but honestly, none of that really mattered to me. But, because of the way that I dress and the neighborhood I live in, I was bullied constantly as a child. Hell, I still get bullied. I've just learned how to fight back.

Now the people are scared of me. They steer clear of me because they think I'm dangerous. If they just stopped to get to know me, they'd see that I really wasn't all that bad.

But, hey, it's not like I minded at all. I prefer to be alone anyway.

Everyone was just so damned nosey and snobby. They only care about drama. They're always looking for the next thing to spread and ruin someone's life. And it's usually stupid shit! Like, stuff that they can't help. No one knows what other people are really going through. If everyone could just mind their own business, the world would be a much simpler place.

But you'll find that if you just get to know someone, you might find out that you actually like them a lot.

Speaking of which, there is someone right now who I like.

I like him a lot.

He's someone who you would never really picture with a guy like me and honestly, we really aren't "together". We have sex and do all of that good stuff but that's really it. Because of who he is, I really shouldn't be all that surprised that he wouldn't really be into it. After all, he's only doing this stuff because I'm blackmailing him.

That thought left a bitter taste in my mouth.

I guess a certain part of me is wishing that eventually, he'll fall into this cycle with me and soon, he won't be able to be without me. I want him to begin to fall for me, just like I did for him. But there's another part of me that knows that he won't do that. There are just too many factors against it.

He's straight. He's out of my league. The guy cares too much about his reputation to ever even be with me in public. And plus... This kid's got his whole life ahead of him. He's got so much to live for and so much to give... I'll only drag him down.