Family Matters

In Which There is Newly Introduced Ships.

"Really Hunk?" Keith asked skeptically. "I doubt they will approve, and I get that you think it would be a cute way to confess and all, but this is also the part where I can destroy all of Lance's dreams."

Hunk shifted uneasily. "I mean yeah, you don't have to. It's just, all I have ideas for. You know what I should probably just go. You should go work on this with someone else." He stared at his hands.

Keith rolled his eyes. "Fine, but I'll probably make this version of you get rejected. As much as I'd like it to be for Allura, I can't have both space parents cheating. Also, slow burn rejection. You will regret asking me this."

Everyone had collected at Uncle Coran's house for The Ultimate Sleepover Party© (property of Lance McClain). Lance was sitting on the floor with Nyma, who literally everyone got a bad vibe from, and Hunk was cuddled up with Pidge.

Space dad was watching and laughing along with Keith. No one split up Team Punk.

Space mom stood off to the side, talking to her cousin Matt. Matt is decidedly space dad number two. He will be referred to as both interchangeably. They both mumbled about space dad's sexy abs so it's a wonder space mom isn't going to realize Shatt is a thing too. But Keith ships it more than he ships his actual space parents. Space dad two has the decency to fuck space dad one outside of their house.

Keith glares across the room at Lance for seemingly no reason. Nyma is practically sitting in his lap, like Pidge is with Hunk.

Pidge mumbles incoherently into their can of soda. When Hunk asks them to speak up, they nearly shout, "When is he going to realize she just wants his stupid money!" at the TV screen.

Hunk giggles while any other character I don't really care which-

"Is that really necessary though? I mean, the story's great. I don't mean to interrupt. But was that necessary?" Hunk rambled.

"Jesus Christ you're almost worse than Lance!" Keith glared down at his pen.

"Okay. Nevermind then."

Someone else cracks up, Hunk giggles. To whoever reading, I'm sorry. I have to write this with the aid of a bunch of idiots. Moving on.

Lance gets up to badly reenact a scene from the show, and Nyma grimaces. His face falls but his confidence doesn't waver. He's a dense idiot, why would it.

Pidge snickers at the acting and Hunk offers to go get more food.

Allura and Pidge talk girl stuff while he's gone. Even though Allura is Pidge's space mom. And Pidge is not strictly a girl. Hunk can overhear something about 'boys boys boys, come on pigeons must like boys too, tell me something at least' but ignores it. Apparently everyone here likes ignoring how shitty the family situation is. Again I'm really sorry reader, my writing is getting worse and worse as I'm stuck here in this cell, being forced to write my way to freedom.

"What are you even talking about now Keith, you agreed to this. As far as I know you enjoy this." Hunk was very loudly eating his space replacement for potato chips.

"Yes. I actually am. However, if a stranger ever finds this book, I fully intend on making their experience hell," Keith deadpanned.

Matt walked up to space dad while space mom was distracted by her poor pigeon child, slapping his ass. Space dad smiled at him grateful and turned lead him to the kitchen, unaware that not-his-child Hunk was making more food.

Space dad one pushed space dad two into the refrigerator, door open. It was one of Shiro's kinks. Definitely. Poor Hunk was scarred as his not-space-parents made out in his refrigerator.

Hunk now has traumatic PTSD triggered by the sound of refrigerator doors opening.

•This is a joke and not meant to offend anyone•

Pidge falls asleep on Hunk when he comes back, completely unaware of the torture he's been through or the feelings he has for them.