Leigh-Anne: Am I a good person? No.
Perrie: Leigh-
Leigh-Anne: Do I try to become a better person? Also no.
Perrie: ...
~~~
Jesy: Nobody's perfect.
Jade: Except me. I'm flawless.
~~~
*After Perrie accidentally destroyed Jesy's favourite sweater*
Jesy: Here, I made you a cup of Earl Grey-tea.
Perrie: Is it poisoned?
~~~
Sam: Baby...
Jade: If I'm not all you need, then just set me free, I'm down on my knees
Sam: Please, listen-
Jade: If you're not the one for me, then just let me be, I'm begging you please
Sam: Do you think song lyrics are appropriate right now?
Jade:
Sam:
Jade: Yes.
~~~
Leigh-Anne: Do you want to fuck?
Jesy: Excuse me?
Leigh-Anne: Oh my God, I meant "do you want to eat dinner?"
Jesy: Sure-
Perrie: You can eat Leigh's pussy for dinner.
Jade: *Accidentally swallows and chokes on gum*
~~~
Leigh-Anne: Lmfao, Cheat Codes call their fans "cheaters".
Jesy: Zayn is their number one fan.
~~~
Perrie: You're my favourite hello and my hardest goodbye.
Jade: Aww.
Perrie: I was talking to my bed.
~~~
*After hurting Jade*
Jesy: What are you gonna do? Cry about it?
Jade: Uhm, yes.
~~~
Jade: How was your day, babe?
Jesy: The sun was shining and I thought it was gonna be a nice day until that bitch...
*Glares at Leigh-Anne*
Jesy: ...walked across my path.
Jade: *Grabs popcorn* I can't wait to hear the full story.
~~~
Leigh-Anne: What can I do to get skinnier fingers?
Jade: You can finger me. *Wiggles eyebrows*
Perrie: *Slams hand on coffee table* excuse me, ma'am, I will not have that sexual nature in my room!
~~~
Jesy: *Dying because of blood loss*
Leigh-Anne: Don't die.
Jesy: Thanks, Leigh, those words saved my life. *Dies*
Leigh-Anne: *Crying* sarcastic motherfucker.
~~~
Jesy: When you think about it, nobody dies a virgin.
Perrie: Huh?
Jesy: Life fucks us all.
~~~
*Playing Uno*
Leigh-Anne: *Stares at her cards* I'm going to win!
Perrie: *Lays a Wild Draw Four card* you sure about that, honey?
Leigh-Anne: I hate this game! *Flips table*
~~~
Interviewer: If you could have anything in the world, what would it be?
Leigh-Anne: A private island.
Jade: A healthy heart.
Jesy: A loving father.
Perrie: Pizza.
~~~
*At a meeting with Syco*
Simon: Where's Perrie?
Jesy: Between Alex's thighs.
~~~
Perrie: Do deaf people get scared when they fart?
Leigh-Anne: Why would they get scared?
Jade: Maybe because they can feel their ass explode but not hear anything.
Leigh-Anne: Your ass doesn't "explode" when you fart, Jade.
Perrie: It actually depends on what kind of farts you have.
Leigh-Anne: Do you fart bombs or what?
Perrie: I fart nuclear bombs after I've eaten curry.
Jade: Your farts are fatal.
Leigh-Anne: Eh, I have better things to do. Contact me when you grow up.
Leigh-Anne left the group chat
Perrie: So Jade, what do you think? Do deaf people get scared when they fart?
Jade: I think so. I mean, if I was deaf and my ass suddenly exploded, I'd freak out for sure.
~~~
Leigh-Anne: If I die-
Jesy: Hold up, if?! Don't you mean when?
Leigh-Anne: No. I've found a way to stay alive forever.
Jade: *Gasps* DID YOU KILL A UNICORN AND DRANK ITS BLOOD?!
Leigh-Anne: This is not Harry Potter, Jade. Get a grip.
Perrie: Why would you even want to live forever?
Leigh-Anne: BECAUSE I'M AFRAID OF DYING, OKAY?!
Perrie: Jeez, chill your bean and have a cocktail.
____________________________________________________
Random, I know, but have you guys ever had a lucid dream? If you have, I'd love to hear about your experience :)
YOU ARE READING
Texts & Scenarios || Little Mix
FanfictionPerrie: What happens after we die? Jade, Jesy, Leigh-Anne: GO TO SLEEP!!!
