Throwaway People

Kitty Decides to Stay

Green Acres, Camp: 8:14 PM

Kitty woke up in a bed with sheets that smelled like lavender and sage. Her hair smelled like the sheets. She was completely naked. It took Kitty a little time to process what had happened. She remembered Patty bringing her to this place.

Moonlight came through a window opposite of the door in the room. Two beds were on either side of that door. Kitty's backpack sat beside the door. Kitty pulled the backpack up on the bed. She opened it. Most of her stuff was there, except for the money, her stash of pot and rolling papers. Kitty knew the money was gone, but she was disappointed at losing her pot.

Kitty remembered the hot shower. Patty had let Kitty stay in there until the hot water was gone. She felt so clean. No smell of men's cologne, sex, pot, or cheap perfume on her. The bed smelled clean. No mildew, sex, or sweat smell. No bugs biting her or roaches crawling over her face. The room was organized. Clean.

Kitty got up and opened the window. She saw a row of tall trees. She couldn't see anything over the top of the trees except stars. The moon must have been on the wrong side of the house, she didn't see it. It must have been full.

With fresh cool air coming in the room, Kitty went over to the closet. She found clothes inside with dusty plastic over them. Kitty pulled out a navy blue dress. Taking a pair of panties from her backpack, Kitty slip them on and then slipped the dress over her head. On the floor of the closet was a pair of deck shoes the same color as the dress.

Kitty opened the door into a short hall. To her left was a door. A stair going up was beside the bathroom door. To her right was a large open room that looked to be a combination of living room, dining area, and kitchen. She saw Patty and a strange man sitting at the dining table as she walked into the room. Sitting on the table between them was a hurricane lamp that lit the room.

"How are you doing, Kitty?" Patty asked. The man just stared at Kitty.

"I'm okay." Kitty said. "Where am I?"

"Our camp." Patty gestured to the man. "This is Jim. Come sit down. We have some rice and canned chicken with some veggies mixed in."

Jim got up and took a pan off the stove. He scooped the contents onto three plates. There was already glasses of water on the table. Kitty sat in the empty chair beside one plate. She tried the chicken and yellow rice. It was spicy, but so good.

"Thanks." Kitty managed between forkfuls.

She would live. Kitty ate the most filling meal she'd had in weeks. Kitty felt the bruises on her legs, arms. She wasn't particularly sore. It was nothing compared to when Jose or Andy beat her up. Kitty was used to it. It was like the rain falling from the sky, it happened, there was nothing to be done about it, but get wet or get out of the rain.

"Kitty, we'd like you to stay in camp for a while. Until we can reach your folks or make some other arrangement." Patty said.

"What about Jose?" Kitty was worried about what would happen to her when Jose found out she lost his money. "He'll be looking for me."

"Jim and I are the only people who know where you are." As Patty talked Jim simply watched Kitty. Kitty wondered what he wanted. "If you stay hidden here you will be safe from Jose."

"What about you and Jim?" Kitty knew Jose would send Andy after them if he found out they were hiding Kitty. "Jose will have you killed if he finds out you are hiding me here. Me too."

"No one knows we have you." Jim finally spoke. "If anyone did see us together we can say that you said you were running away to Tampa. If you stay hidden no one will know the difference."

It sounded to Kitty that they had worked things out between themselves before she got up. To Kitty it sounded like a good plan. It was still difficult for Kitty to think straight. It felt like she had smoked too much pot. Once she had eaten Kitty wanted to lay down again. Kitty hoped that by the time she woke up she would be herself again.

Green Acres, Florida: November 22, 2:00 AM

Kitty woke up again. The window was closed, Patty snored away in the other bed. Kitty grabbed a pink robe from a hook on the door. Wrapping it around her Kitty opened the door to the next room. She grabbed her pink backpack. Bringing it with her. The hall was black. Light from the main room helped Kitty navigate the hall. In the main room Kitty looked for her street clothes in her backpack. Pulling out the white latex dress and jacket.

It smelled. It was dirty. The smell of pot lingered in Kitty's backpack. Her small stuffed bear fell out that she had found on the sidewalk back in February. It smelled too. Kitty had thought about running away. Going back to Jose. Taking the beating after she worked for a few hours. To at least bring in some money. Not that many clients picked up girls this early in the morning.

Was this what she wanted? To be dirty. To be called garbage. Basura was what the Guardia called her. Gatita Sexa or sex kitten in english. That was what Kitty was short for. Her real name? Kitty wasn't sure. It was so long ago.

Kitty had chosen to forget about the fact that she had a Mother. She chose to forget about Winnie. Kitty even chose to forget the long trip from Rapid City, South Dakota to West Palm Beach, Florida. All she chose to remember was her stay at the Casa Sombrio. Six years in that hell.

Trying to remember her family caused Kitty to have headaches. Kitty would see a room in her mind. She would remember the noise that made her come out of that room. Her sister Winnie had gone somewhere that night. There was only her Mother and her in the apartment. Kitty would get that far before remembering brought on the headache. The headache stopped her from focusing on the memories and she promptly forgot what she did remember.

Flashes in Kitty's mind of her being in the room in the apartment. Something wet on Kitty's face. There was the Wanagi. A ghost. That first time she was raped. Her Mommy's eyes staring. Empty.

Kitty smoked pot to help her forget. All she needed to know was the here and now. Like when Jose smacked her if her mind wandered during sex. Focus on the now. Only the now was away from the hell she was familiar with. There was no pot to help her forget what happened.

Kitty began to sob uncontrollably. Andy had made her dirty. Turned her into garbage. Andy had told her it was her own fault. She should have stayed in bed. If she had, Kitty wouldn't have seen him. She had been a bad girl for getting out of bed to check on her Mother. If she hadn't Kitty wouldn't have seen Mommy's empty eyes. Andy wouldn't have wiped the bad thing on Kitty's face.

Kitty curled up into a little ball beside her backpack. Her clothes lay where she threw them on the floor. Sleep was merciful as she surrendered to it. In sleep Kitty forgot about what had happen to her. She forgot about Mommy's empty eyes staring at her from the bed.

That would not last, now that Kitty was safe, the night terrors would come.