Throwaway People

Christmas Plans

8:45 AM

At some point Keyote fell asleep. Her head in Patty's lap. Patty gently transferred Keyote's head to a throw pillow. Jim motioned for Patty and Crow to follow him down the stairs. Crow felt that at the moment they all needed a drink. Perhaps several stiff drinks.

They sat at the battered old desk each staring at a drink they hadn't touched. Jim broke the silence first.

"I hope we haven't done more harm than good." Jim pushed his glass aside. He only thought he wanted a drink. "I sort of wish that was simply a false memory or some sort. I know it's not."

"That's no false memory, the way she reacted. If she wanted to tell some lie, she'd have said it was just another dream about seeing her Mother laying there dead." Crow said.

"False memory?" Patty asked.

"A false memory is one of the ways that the subconscious mind protects itself." Jim explained. "If you didn't want to admit that your life of prostitution was your decision for instance, your mind might make up a false memory of your being abused by a relative or friend. Causing yourself or others to believe that was the reason you turned to prostitution."

"You think Keyote might have made something up to protect herself from something she felt was her fault." Patty said.

"No. I wish she did, but she clearly blames herself for that child's death." Jim took the glass in his hand. Staring at the glass. "That is why she suppressed the memory. Fucking bastards."

The shot glass in Jim's hand sudden launched itself against the wall behind him as Jim rose and turned away from the two women. Jim's hands' shook as he tried to regain control. Both women were silent. Patty had started to go to Jim. Crow put a gentle, restraining hand on her shoulder. Jim stood there shaking with his back to them.

"It isn't your fault, Jim. Recovering that memory was a good thing for Keyote." Crow said. "Her subconscious has been forcing this memory to the surface for weeks now. Just as it had pushed what happened to her when her Mother died into her conscious mind. She didn't want to face it on a conscious level, but it was time."

"No child should go through what Keyote has been through. No one should have a memory like that." Jim said. He turned back around and sat in the chair again. "Those bastards should be castrated, fed their own dicks, and lobotomized for good measure."

"Well, maybe castrated and lobotomized." Patty agreed. "Cut it all completely off."

Crow slid her glass of bourbon over to Jim. "Try not to throw this one against the wall. That bourbon is too good to waste like that." Crow said.

Jim smiled at her. Downed her shot and poured her another.

All three of the adults had a good buzz on when they climbed up the stairs. Keyote was still asleep. Crow started searching through the cupboards to see what kind of food was available. As the three of them considered what to have for lunch Key woke up.

"I have a bad headache." Key said.

Patty was automatically sitting next to Key, one arm around Key's shoulders, the other hand pressed against her forehead. "No fever." Patty assured herself. "Do you remember anything now?"

"It was her eyes." Key said. "They were empty, like Mom's were."

Key sounded empty herself. Drained emotionally.