𝙚𝙘𝙤𝙡𝙞𝙣𝙚 236

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I wake up unexpectedly, sitting and taking deep breaths. The room is completely dark. A feeble light that comes from another room reach bashfully the blanket that covers my body. I look around and rediscover the naked back, muscular shoulders and Hoseok's resting face.

I want to cry. It was all a mistake. Why was I thinking of going at his house? Why did I got influenced by his eyes, his voice, his movements? Why did I allowed something like this happen? Why was I so stupid?

I move the blanket and got up, trying not to make any noise. I pick up my clothes from the floor and get dressed.

Hoseok is my psychologist. Now can I go to him without feeling embarrassed and awkward? Our relationship won't be like it was. I must talk to another even though I don't want to. I want Hoseok. 

I exit his room in search of my jacket and my shoes.

 It was a mistake making love with him. And probably I was the only one feeling something. How could I like him? I go to high school and I don't have any experience. It's like staying with a child. Yes, staying with a child and teaching him life's things. But the gap between our ages isn't so big, so maybe I have a chance. I'm thinking too much.

I tie my shoes. Put my jacket on , found in the living room. And I go near the exit door, rubbing my eye with the back of my hand.

Maybe is because I like Hoseok. I think that my behavior is normal. I mustn't deceive. It was just some sex. Everyone has sex, but not always with the person that they love. 

It's totally normal these days. So I should pretend that nothing happened. Easy no?

I breath noisily. I wish I could yell but maybe my reaction is exaggerate. 

 I lay my hand in the door knob to open it, but a voice, his voice, stops me.

"Where are you going?" He asks with a sleepy voice.

I hesitate to answer. I'm wondering if running away is the right choice.

"away" I restrict myself, telling him with brave.