My Dear Butler

5. Yearning

Yesung leans against the cold wall, eavesdropping on your conversation. He had originally followed you out to ensure your protection, but this was unlike anything he had expected to see.

Placing a hand on his chest, he felt his erratic heartbeat. It felt so painful, the way it throbbed. Despite the words he had said to you earlier, Yesung had dreaded this dinner as much as you did. He didn't want the only person that has ever trusted, cared, and loved him to be taken away. But he couldn't be selfish.

After all, he was only a mere butler. The feelings he felt were absurd.

So he only stood there, unable to do anything, heartbroken and on the verge of tears as Donghae swept you away like the wind.

"See, hun? There's nothing you need to worry about," your mother smiled reassuringly at you. "The two of you seem to be getting along quite well. He seems to like you."

"I guess? I don't know..." You tried to hide your smile.

"I hope you're looking forward to this marriage as much as we are. It's about time," your father added.

Oh hell yeah. Your mind was occupied by the kiss that Donghae had given you, remembering and relishing the taste of it and how it felt. It was something unlike you've ever experienced. You were a blushing mess afterward, you didn't know how to react. Donghae had laughed and patted your head.

Another gesture that had caused you to tense up.

"Let's meet up again tomorrow, alright? I'll come over to you instead," he had said. "Let's go on a date."

And you were going to be there and open the door for him, you told yourself.

Everything that had happened tonight both physically and mentally drained you, so as soon as you entered your room, you collapsed onto your bed. Your mind was whirling with the thoughts of him and only him, smiling like a fool as you changed into your nightgown.

Ah, Donghae...

I can't wait.

A voice from behind startled you. "My lady, you're still awake?"

You jumped and spun around, your eyes wide as you realized the voice belonged to your butler. "Oh my goodness, you scared me!" You dramatically placed a hand on your chest, laughing.

Yesung chuckled. "You should rest soon. Tonight must've been very tiresome for you." You nodded as you climbed into your bed.

"And you too," you returned.

Yesung then moved to close the balcony windows for you. His hands lingered on the curtains, as he seemed to be lost in his thoughts for a moment. He stared unblinkingly outside your window, completely silent. He exhaled deeply, letting out a shuddered breath as his hands gripped the cloth tightly.

"Yesung...?"

He turned to you with a heartbroken expression, his long bangs blocking part of his empty gaze. Almost as if he was hiding his feelings behind them. But you didn't need to see his eyes clearly to know that he was hurting, that he was in deep pain despite the smile he wore. And it tore your heart apart, not knowing how to relieve his pain. You felt terribly guilty for not being able to do something as simple as comforting him, while Yesung did so much for you day after day.

That smile may or may not have fooled you, for the next moment you blinked, the expression was completely gone, only the smile remaining. You were slightly taken aback, not knowing whether it was your mind playing tricks on you or not.

"Yes, my lady?"

You blinked, not knowing what to say. Gulping, you averted your eyes away and whispered,

"Sleep well tonight."

Yesung nodded as he moved and turned off the lights.

"You too, Lady Y/N."