Jesse

Epilogue: A love not forgotten

Epilogue: A love not forgotten

            73 years later…

            I am here at last, Jesse. Ninety-years old. Nothing but an old, withered unmarried man. And no I haven't forgotten about you, Jesse. Although I can't exactly remember your face like I used to, and some of the memories have frayed like the edges of aged, cherished photographs; however, not one day hasn't passed that I haven't thought of you. When I think about you, I smile, remembering. Sometimes, the tears still come. But it has gotten easier.

            I have made New York my last home for you, Jesse. Earlier today, I was outside in Central Park feeding the pigeons like I usually do, when I saw a couple of young teenage boys throwing a Frisbee not far from me. One of them reminded me so much of you. Funny enough, when he missed the Frisbee that landed close to my feet, I saw him run up and get it. He smiled at me saying hello, before leaving. I continued smiling; listening to the light sounds of the park, watch the sun shimmer brightly through the shading trees. It is spring, now.

            Everything is beautiful and right again. Winter passed, and its cold, brittle nights alone. But I'm not really alone after all—because I think of you. With me. Lying in my small little bed in our apartment Jesse. It looks exceptionally nice. Well, it's not much as I said. But it's ours Jesse. All ours.

            And it is here, tonight, as I lie in my bed. I feel myself drifting off into sleep, but not just any sleep—this sleep is different. The one I have waited for, for so long.

            I feel myself gasp as my life: everything floods into my closed eyes with such blinding light. First, I see my dead mother and father, and even Kellan! There he is! We're hugging! We're rejoicing, finally together at last. But the golden light of this wonderful place fades as I think of you, and the first time we were together in my bed. It is then I finally see you Jesse. I hear your voice at last, calling me.

            I breathe in, and my eyes flutter open. I'm there. The moonlight overflows my room—my old room back in St. Louis!—everything looks just as it had been! I can't believe it. But it is then, I smell something I haven't smelt in so long, I have nearly forgotten, and then I feel your hair against my neck, the soft touch of your hand along the skin of my arm. Remember the way your hair smelled; I couldn't explain it. It's you Jesse!

            "It's been a long time, Ian," Jesse says, eyeing me, grinning as he lies beside me on my bed, propping his head up with an arm.

            I feel the tears stream down; I'm crying. I can't help it. He's here. Jesse is actually here, with me! "I can't believe it…But I'm just an old man now, Jesse. You wouldn't want me—"

            "No, Ian—look."

            So I do, and my falls open; I'm seventeen again. I feel the invigorating strength and vitality of youth—all of it, fill me, and I smile, and suddenly embrace him. I couldn't describe this moment, holding Jesse again—I thought I would never be able to do this once more, but here I am! "I've missed you so much."

            "I haven't." I see him smiling facetiously.

            "Why?"

            "Because Ian: I've never left you. I was with you still, during your graduation; when you went off to New York with everybody…Every day since we parted, even when you thought I wasn't. I was."

            "I'm never letting go now."

            "You don't have to…We've got all the time we could ever need, now."

            Then I find my lips sinking into his and we share the kiss I have longed for more than any other—the one that made me, feel like me again. It sets me once again on fire, the sweat trickling, the fingers running through matted hair, the taste of overwhelming passion, and burning desire at last quenched. Then I feel us both flying into the shadows that takes us, and when I open my eyes again, we're standing before the eternity together; I feel his hand clasping mine tightly. I look to Jesse one last time.

            "Ready?"

            I nod, and it doesn’t matter where I’m going, where we’re embarking off into the unknown—because I’m with him.

            Together.