Aise Judey Hain Silsile

Time for Decisions!

Khushi POV

"So the weather is actually not so bad. I mean its really nice. Monsoons have a way to make things bright...right?"
An over-enthusiastic Mehek said.

However I was not really paying attention to her words. My mind was miles away. I was lost. It has been 4 days. 4 long days since I met my husband...no...contract husband. We are not even talking on the phone. Its just that I dont have anything to say to him right now. The last we spoke was when I screamed and shouted at him. His last words still continued to ring in my mind. When I had asked him about a hypothetic situation where roles would have reversed and he had to forgive or punish me....

"No. I am too complicated. With no goodness within me. Only you bring out that side of me. My darkness would have taken over. Because I am not like you. I am imperfect."

His words were honest.

From the heart.

He has been like that since the night we met each other in that hotel. And I like him for his honesty. For taking care of me when I felt so alone. For being the only support apart from Mehek. He had also hinted once that he has made errors in the past. There is nothing but repentance which reflects in my favourite pair of chocolate orbs.

However there is another big truth that cannot be ignored and that is my hidden past. My locked memories. What if I forgive him....? No this forgiveness will be questioned once I get back my memory. Will I be strong enough at that moment? I have no clue. My dilemma is killing me.

But the most significant thing in all of this is the fact that I miss Arnav Singh Raizada...the one whom I still consider my husband. My life. My everything.

"Jerry...are you even listening to my words?"
An agitated Mehek asked.

"Not really. I dont think so."
I replied in a emotionless tone. And continued to walk.

"Stop Khushi."
I heard Meheks voice from behind.

"Why...?"
I asked not wanting to stop the journey.

"Because you are at cross roads."
Her words were underlined with a hint of something.

I stopped and looked ahead only to see that her words were nothing but the truth.

"And I know it Mehek. I am just so confused. This is so much like my life. My past with Arnav was not milk and roses. It was hurtful and full of pain. And now the guy who I just month a few months back who claimes to be my husband...I have started falling for him. I cannot even think of going away from him. Yet. Yet I am afraid. Yes Mehek I am scared that once I recall my memories I wont be able to forgive Arnav. I will loose him ultimately. Either today or tomorrow."
I said in an exhausted tone leaning against a random car.

Mehek walked to the car leaning in a similar posture and accompanied me.
"Look I...I dont really know anything about your life. And you cannot tell me much since you have Amnesia. At the end of the day its your decision whether to forgive him and accept his flaws or to punish and move on in life. However, from my perspective I can only say one thing. Anand my husband was everything to me once. I loved him. I miscarried and lost our baby. And months later was informed that I can never carry another one. Anand who always wanted kids lost his cool and slowly we drifted apart to the point where divorce was the only solution. But 6 months later he came back to me. For a minute I felt hopeful. Althought it was a lost case since he only came to get his car insurance papers which he forgot to take when we parted ways. What I am trying to say is that I had no one to whom I could offer a second chance. I desperately wanted Anand to come back for that second chance. Not all of us are that lucky Khushi."
Two tiny tears rolled down her eyes.