The Bitter Everythings || ✓

SOMETHING SHE NEVER WANTED TO BE.

(Second last chapter.)

Chapter is in third person.

For the second time this month Andrea found herself clad in black, ready for a funeral.

The black dress decently fell around her body and her hair was pulled back in a tight bun.

She sat in the front row and glanced slightly at the silver ring that rested on her finger. It looked beautiful as the light refracted from the inlaid diamonds.

Last time she was here, she had fought to give a eulogy, though now no one questioned her when she refused to even look up during Damien's funeral.

Instead everyone was surprised.

But Andrea had her own reasons.

Damien and her had promised each other to not give a eulogy at each others funeral because they knew that it would break them. It would break them to have to look at each other placed in a coffin or underneath a tombstone, decorated with some withered  flowers.

So she sat and sighed, remembering how her b'day was a day scarred for life.

Her eyes stung as she thought back on the times they had spent together. She didn't even tell him that she loved him. Not only as a best friend. But as something more too.

Her feelings extended further than that. They extended further than the reach of words.

But now. It was not going to happen. Never. Nothing could be changed. She was trapped inside the walls that she built herself, and the only key to her was far out of reach now.

She looked up to see the blue tinted coffin being buried. It was empty. They hadn't been able to find his body and considering the fall and the damage done to the plane, everyone agreed on the funeral.

Though Andrea still doubted. Her Dai wouldn't have left her so soon. Not after asking her such a morbid question.

"Be my girlfriend?"

Now she knew why he had asked her not to open the box. He didn't want to hurt her. But the damage was done. It wasn't his fault. Because the pain inflicted on Lana was completed self caused. Nothing anyone can do to change that truth.

It's been five days since the crash and Andrea had finally agreed on the funeral.

She had called Mr and Mrs Montez to come and attend it and now they sat beside her. But Andrea didn't make an effort to comfort them.

And they didn't really question.

Because everyone sitting there could see that Andrea was turning cold. She didn't care about her survival anymore. She only had people to lose and nothing to gain. Everything that provided her comfort was slowly and gradually dying.

And Andrea, not knowing what to do, was doing what she did best. Keeping things within. But the things she kept with in, that's if there was anything to keep, was something she wasn't sure even existed.

Emptiness.

Was is it even an emotion? Or was it a lack of it?

She got up as soon as the coffin was buried and moved to her car. She didn't want to go near the grave. She couldn't. And if she did, the guilt inside her would want to overwhelm all her senses.

Xavier had only one reason to attack that plane.

Andrea.

And she knew that very well.

She was also scared.

She had nothing left inside her. What if she didn't feel anything when she approached him?