I do love you // Jungkook x depressed! reader

Work

I pulled my hair up into a messy bun and smiled at my reflection. I haven't felt so beautiful in a long time. I looked back and saw Jungkook still sleeping. I walked up to him and sat down on the bed next to him. "Kookie. Time to wake up."
He groaned and opened his eyes. "Last night was so fun (Y/n). We should do that more often." I giggled and stroked his hair. "Not today, I have my first day of work here and you have dance practice."
He pouted and looked up at me. "You're no fun, Jagi." I smiled and stroked the soft skin on his naked shoulder. "I made breakfast for you. It's on the counter. Also, I'd appreciate it if you didn't tell Taehyung what we did like you did last time. You know that boy can't keep a secret."
He smiled his adorable bunny smile and ran a hand over my arm. "What if I don't want it to be a secret?" I rolled my eyes at him before pinching his cheek.
"I want to keep it a secret. Tell them we had sex for all I care. But don't give Taehyung a description of everything we did last night." I smiled. I stood up and grabbed my camera case and my purse. "See you tonight Kookie!"
    I walked out of the house and to the nearest bus stop. As I sat on the bench for the bus station, I thought back to what my therapist had told me. Don't surround yourself with toxic memories and toxic surroundings.
    Jungkook had gotten me a therapist once I moved to Seoul to make sure I was going to get better, not worse. At first I kept wanting to quit therapy but I felt guilty because Kookie had payed money for a therapist just for me so I kept going. Eventually I started to get better. I only had depressive thoughts every couple of days instead of every day and whenever I wanted to cut, I was able to avoid it and stop myself. Jungkook was also getting a therapy dog for me to take everywhere I go.
    I sat on the bus in an empty row of seats, staring out the window. I smiled to myself and looked down at my arms. I didn't cover them up as much anymore. I wore short sleeves a lot more often and sometimes I wore waterproof foundation on them for things like job interviews or going to the beach.
    A young man sat next to me and gave me a kind smile. He turned back to his phone and began texting someone. I looked back out the window, a cheeky grin on my face. A couple years ago I would sit in an empty row of seats on the bus and people would avoid me. I don't know why things have changed but I felt so much stronger.
    Once I got off my stop I headed to work, where Blackpink was already waiting for me. They were wearing their photo shoot outfits and all have me a big smile. "(Y/n)!" Jisoo waved. I gave her an enormous grin and waved back.
    So many things have changed since my last suicide attempt. I wasn't the same girl anymore. I was twenty one now and I was close friends with all of bangtan. Me and Yoongi were the closest besides Jungkook because we could relate to one another. I remember one time I was crying because I had a bulimia relapse. Taehyung has ran in because Jungkook wasn't available and he was able to calm me down. He gave me his adorable box smile and rubbed my back soothingly. Then once Jungkook came he left respectively.
    I loved every member with all my heart. It felt silly almost. Five years ago I thought I could never love anymore. Now here I am as a photographer for kpop groups with a future husband and six best friends.
    After the photo shoot it was almost dinner. I waved everyone goodbye and packed up everything and left. The streets were dark in the cool early autumn air. I felt a breeze whip at my hair and blow against my skin, caressing it gently. Although spring was my favorite season, I had to love autumn just as much. The leaves were turning into beautiful fire colors and people began prepping for Halloween.
    Once I stepped on the bus I sat in an empty row and unlocked my phone. My screen saver was of me and Jungkook on our anniversary. He had a big smile on his lips and I mirrored the same look. Both of us were happy and had love in our eyes. I opened the messages app and looked at Jungkook's messages that he sent today.
I miss you so much Jagi!
    Hold up, I gotta go to practice. Love you!
    I'm bored (Y/n). I wish you had been here like last week. Remember when Jimin fell and everyone was laughing because all he had to do was take a step forward. Your laugh's beautiful (Y/n). I hope you know that.
    Jimin didn't fall this time, which is sad but at least he won't complain that he bruised his butt today.
    I smiled at his messages. Jungkook never failed to make you happy. He could just give you one look and automatically I would begin to smile. Even on my worst days.
    When I opened the door to my apartment, the place was dark and empty. I turned on the lights and collapsed on my couch. I had to wait for Jungkook to come over because we promised he'd eat dinner with me. Originally, Bang PD didn't like the idea of Jungkook dating so he told Jungkook to not bring me up in interviews and told him not to wear the ring. But after my failed suicide attempt, he told Jungkook that as long as he was happy he should wear the ring and he could talk about me. Because the true fans will love Jungkook no matter what.