Ben looked out onto the Croatian pitch. His full England debut just seconds away but his mind was elsewhere. He wasn't sure what was running through his mind. Other young players like him would have been overexcited about the idea. He just felt numb.
"Let's go boys!" Was shouted from the front of the line the boys were stood in. Ben looked up and immediately changed his mood. At least on the outside that was. He walked out behind the other players and looked around the empty stadium.
"Some full debut," he thought to himself. An empty stadium, a game behind closed doors, it was nobodys dream of making their debut that way. Ben immediately felt a slap on his back from his teammate and close friend, James as he ran past to the bench.
The game started and half time came quicker than expected. It was a quiet game. Neither England or Croatia making many opportunities for themselves. Gareth shouted words of encouragement at the boys and they were back out on the pitch before they knew it.
The game ended square, England had the best chances but they meant nothing but a draw. Ben sighed once he was back in the changing rooms. He'd played like he'd never played before and it had paid off but he knew they needed a win.
"Don't worry boys, just see it as a warm up for Spain. For an environment we're not used to, we played well." Gareth encouraged before the rest of them began changing back out of their kit.
By the time the boys were back at the hotel it was late. Ben checked his phone one last time once in the room he had on his own due to being the 23rd member of the team. He had the typical text from his girlfriend back home.
~You played well. Please don't beat yourself up over the draw. It was a good game. You did well. You played better than you ever have before. It wasn't your fault, you made the passes to get the ball up front but Croatia were there to defend. Just focus on Spain. You'll win that one. I'll see you in Spain. I love you ~
Her words made him smile a little. She was the only one that understood what was going on in his head. She was the only one to sit and listen. She understood because she'd been there. She'd felt alone whilst surrounded by people. She'd been through it all whilst she'd been pregnant before she met Ben. He had to quickly text her back to let her know he was okay. It was something they always did if one of them was away for a week.
~ Thank you, Baby. I'm alright. I wish you were here so I could explain everything I feel. I hope you're alright and tell Ethan I love him. I love you too. Night ~
Ben immediately lay back on his bed. He threw his phone onto the other bed and picked up the photo he always carried around with him. It was always in his pocket or bag whilst playing away. It was the picture of him with his girlfriend the day Ethan was born.
The two had met whilst she was in her third trimester and he hadn't left her side unless he had to for away games. He helped her from a dark place and now she was trying to do the same for him.
--
Days went by in which Ben was away from home and the Spain game was finally there. Ben looked out into the crowd whilst warming up to see his girlfriend and her little boy Ethan. He smiled weakly when he saw the two and smiled a little more when Ethan spotted him.
The game came quickly and soon he was lined up in the tunnel waiting to go out onto the pitch.
"Let's go boys!" Was shouted again and they began heading out onto the pitch. Ben looked around and spotted his girlfriend again and waved at her slightly.
The game started strongly. England were ahead after 16 minutes and were quickly 3-0 up in the first half. Instead of encouragement being shouted throughout the changing rooms it was Gareth trying to encourage the boys to try keep the ball as much as possible and take a step back.
