BTS Imagines

Spring remembrance (YG x Reader)

Author's note:

Striped carnation meaning: It signifies rejection or refusal. It says that you can't be with someone or it's a simple no to a lover's affections (auntyflo.com).
Inspired by ''Spring Day''

The photos say nothing anymore despite the need for them to continue speaking and thus keep the hot summer loneliness away, dull the sound of the heavy rainfall against the window. The one, in particular, that should talk is the one taken in spring two years ago on a seesaw, the bright sun like a halo illuminating the girl who the light of life cannot compete with.

I miss you.

The thought increases tenfold, the pale walls of the cosy living room narrowing down to the onyx rough metal coffee table with the photo book taken up in a whim displayed on it and the L-shaped with cushions in a warmer auburn shade than will be ever felt again. The time this space was shared frequently has long since passed, unconsciously held hands disappeared from the ground zero between seats while watching a movie, always at first reluctant cuddles nevermore gratefully accepted and enjoyed. It is cruel, the memorized images not providing the cure they were thought to hold. She is still missed and the merciless never ends on the road to success.

Even seeing each other once, rare as the occasion is, is hard since security or screaming fans always follow wherever feet go. It is spiteful how not even a drink can be shared without the agency worrying about rumours or the risk of potential distractions distracting focus from a prospering career.

I hate this point, how things are going between us.

Even though the year still basks in the lingering humid heat which is sometimes lifted by a loud heavy downpour on gloomy days like these, although the temperatures do not really drop until twilight, it may as well be winter. The chill of the dead season lingers in veins slowly transforming into the bare limbs of the trees during the real cold. Regardless of it being August, there is truly nothing but winter's breath to nullify the positivity the new hours might bring. And it always ends the same, just another day tainted by disappointment and futile hope.

Time is relative and gone completely during the concerts where the alter ego of SUGA is taken on, making the mind forgetful of the difficult bond and the worry about the striped carnation petals coughed up in private without the knowledge of dear friends and management.

I'm left alone like the snow-piercer. Do you remember that, Y/N? The book that forms the base for the new era, the one I recommended after Joon had?

The pen scribbling down the lyrics to a song based on the current train of thought is put down with the desire to hold the hand that had to be let go of, the silence deafening now that the scribbling alongside staring at recorded memories has stopped, in spite of the continuous rain that has turned into white noise.

The other side of the world is the place to put an end to this cold that has overtaken private posture the moment feelings were not answered, the rejection at the back entrance of the hotel leaving glassy tears streaming down pale cheeks the instant Y/N expressed doubt about the relationship once of a friendly nature hastily tried to be turned into a nature with a deeper meaning. However, the Skype calls and delayed texts have kept us together somehow and regardless of the confession, albeit in a weaker state than before now that prizes are received almost weekly, concert halls are sold out in minutes and people scream seven names over and over as support.

It is a great perchance because it is not guaranteed to visit the country the beloved lives nor that the emotions which are still stirred up with every contact shall ever be answered, especially since she has moved on from the hope of ever becoming more than this. Every opportunity, hopeless as it is, that can put more meaning to what we have is disregarded and keeps the bond painfully friendly.