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aCoWaS - AliceMabel

AliceMabel please remember ot take my critique seriously and put some of it to use, I spend my time doing this for you free of charge, so please do take some of my advice if not all.

Title: I really like your title so far, and it describes what will happen in the story (well what I think will happen) but it's really suiting. I'm not sure what the “star” part of it is yet, so maybe you're including something about Starfall… If you aren't then, maybe include something about stars as I like titles to have meaning and symbolization. So for that a 9.5/10

Cover: your cover is not the best. And as I've said before it looks like you've just gotten a picture and put words on it. Your story is amazing so you deserve an amazing cover to go with it! There are plenty of cover makers on wattpad, including me. And i'm always happy to do a cover for someone. So i'll be giving you a 6.5/10 for that.

Blurb: okay basically your blurb is just talking about that its set after acofas, and it's a fanfic of sarah j maas’ book. You need to include parts of what happens in the story to grab the reader's attention. Will they click on your book to read it if the blurb is just about that? Probably not. So put something in their like Rhys has Challenged Feyre to a bet, who is the best warrior? Etc. So i'm afraid i can't give you much for this so its a 3/10

Plot: even though it's only been 1 chapter, i'm really liking where the story is going. It has a lot of depth to it, though i think you could improve on a few small things like, at the moment a few things are a bit predictable, it's not bad but you want to surprise your readers so that they want to continue reading to see what happens. So i'll give you a 8/10.

Characters: well these characters are sarah j maas’ so i can't really say much as it is a fan-fic. Personally im not the hugest fans of fanfics but i won't mind reading them if they're really well written as usually the fanfic author doesn't quite match the characters with the real author. I quite like how you've expressed the characters, but i feel like you could dig deeper into their personalities. So even though sarah j maas doesn't say that feyres good at singing, you could surprise us and say that feyre is amazing at singing. So just go and dig deeper into their personalities and try and convey them as sarah j maas does. I'll give you a 7/10

Setting: your setting is pretty good, you could be a bit more descriptive, but you've chosen significant locations from the book and that's really good as well. So I don't have much more to say about the setting but you'll get a 9/10

Grammar: it's pretty good, but your dialogue is letting you down. As i said in the previous chapter you need to do it so it would be like this:
Harry looked at Ron and Hermione,

“Run” he bellowed.

Ron and Hermione sprinted away from the dementors.

Not like this (this is what you are currently doing):
Harry looked at Ron and Hermione “Run” he bellowed. Ron and Hermione sprinted away from the dementors.

But apart  from that, your grammar is great, so ill give you an 8/10

Overall your score was 51/70 great job!! Keep it up!! You lost most of your marks on the blurb so just get something up over there that is about your story not sarah j maas’!!

General feedback: i really enjoyed reading this, being a fan on sarah j maas im not the biggest fan of fanfics but I can tolerate them, but yours was great, I can't wait to read more of aCoWaS!  Not much else to say, just fix up where you've gone wrong and you'll be a professional in no time!! I am always available to do a cover for you as well, and I love the idea of this fanfic! I can't wait to read more!!

AliceMabel remeber if you have any problems with this review please message me privately, but itherwise I cant wait to see more of you!!