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Little Grim - Grlenflame

Please remember that even though this may seem harsh, I am only trying to help you improve your writing. And i would like to see you take some of this feedback, and use it because i have put my time and effort into it. Here is your review grlenflame

Title: I really liked the the title it really told us  the book and conveyed what the book was about. But going from that, I feel like lots of books have similar titles to that so like little grim, like that's yeah it's a good title but if I search up little groom on Wattpad it comes up with lots and lots of different things so you probably might need to change that but otherwise really good job with your title, 8/10

Cover: I'm not a huge fan of the cover I feel like it could be something better and as I’ve said before there are hundreds and hundreds of people that are willing to make covers for you on Wattpad like I could but I'm not that great so probably not me, but there are tons of other people who can make you covers. With your cover I feel like it's just picture from the internet with words, like it doesn't even have your name on it as the author. like you want your readers to know that you put effort into your cover and which then shows that you put effort into your book which is what you want because we just don't want to see a book which doesn't have a cover or like it's the default cover. it they portrays that you don't really care about your book and from I've seen of your writing you care about your book a lot. 4/10

Blurb: your blurb is pretty decent but it's not as good as it could be. It has a lot about the kings and queens and Prince helios but I feel like it should have more about Pearl since from what I've read there's a lot of things about Pearl and she's the main character so it probably needs to have more about that. I know for my books at the moment I'm not following the structure but generally when I do, I use dialogue then explain a bit and then more dialogue and like if readers are scrolling through and they just see dialogue they're  just like oh that looks interesting I'll see what this is about and click on your book. you then get more readers which is probably what you want but otherwise really good job on the blurb. 6/10

Plot: ok so the plot is a bit slow moving. generally for me personally I like fast-moving plots, but it doesn't mean that you're plot is bad. I just feel like it hasn't really gotten that far in the five chapters that I read (because I stopes that the sex scene with Helios and because I don't want to read that) but it's a very slow-moving story like you've got amazing description and stuff but since this is a wattpad book, like it's different from a normal book you need to be more fast-paced, something interesting needs to happen in every single chapter for a wattpad book. like if it was a normal book then yeah sure you can do that, but it is on Wattpad so it's not the same. Readers want to see something happen everything is chapter on Wattpad so probably add a bit more Twist in but I don't know I only read up to the sex scene, so I don't know there might be some stuff later that I haven't read but from what I did read it needs to be more fast paced and more interesting things that happened but apart from that amazing job with your plot it's really well done. 5/10

Characters: so you're characters are really interesting, we get an idea of what they look like, you've put in a cast list also for the characters. Also about the cast list, maybe put it in a different chapter so like if people want to imagine what they see the characters to look like then they wont want to see the cast list. So put the cast list in a separate chapter so the people that do want to know exactly how you imagine the characters look like can access that separately. but I feel that you should let the readers decided imagine what the character looks themselves. I only read the first five chapters or so but there isn't much character development from that I mean I know it's like just the start of the book but it's always good to have lots of character development going because it really shows how the character is growing and changing. But otherwise, amazing jobs with descriptions, like everywhere, you've got a huge description (which I also suggest to cut down as you can I have your readers to imagine some things) but otherwise amazing job, 6/10

Setting: with your settings I was very confused at times where she was. but when I do know where she is it's really, really, really, really super descriptive. So usually when I'm doing a review usually I have to tell the person to explain it in more detail so we can allow the readers to get a really Vivid image of what is going on but with you I feel like you're explaining it too much. so you need to cut down on how much your explaining things to allow readers to imagine some things themselves but otherwise amazing job, 7/10

Grammar: well as far as I can see your grammar is on Point. As I've said many times before I'm not the best person to ask background because that is one of my weak spots Stringer writing but as far as I can see your grandma is really well done your dialogue is correct and everything so good job, 9/10

Your overall score was 45/70  amazing job

General feedback: I feel like your main point of downfall was your cover and the over explaining of things which then leads to how slow moving the plot is. As I said before your grammar is amazing, your plot was pretty decent your setting was pretty good and you've done an amazing job, and no you didn't get 70/70 but everyone can improve, even like Rick Riordan (percy jackson series) can improve his writing in someway, like I was watching this books once and he mentioned Skulduggery Pleasant which she spelt with two “l"s instead of one and I was really annoyed by that, but otherwise, amazing job! And keep writing!

Please remember if you have any problems with your review please message me privately. But otherwise great job, I can't wait to see more!!