With Love, 𝓜𝓇. 𝒥

𝚊𝚗𝚍

" Boss? Breakfast is ready. "

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" You got lucky this time... but don't think ya got over-- "

Joker would tease before unraveling the blanket Harley wore around her and grabbing his discarded robe and dressing her in it.

The pair would walk slowly down the set of stairs before the sweet scent of waffles could travel up to them.

" WAFFLES! " Harley squeaked.

Immediately she ran down the stairs passed her lover, and tossed herself into a chair at the table. Pouring copious amounts of syrup onto the waffle, listening for a short while as it sizzled on top of the Eggo- brand breakfast.

By the time J had reached the table, Harley had already dug into her breakfast and was halfway through when they were interrupted.

"Boss, we got everythin' on the Squid."

"Is that what he calls himself? Pathetic."

Joker returned to his meal and barked between bites,

"Well? Whataya waitin for an invitation? Tell me!"

The goons removed a few papers from a vanilla folder at their sides and read off the information.

"The guy's name is Sidney Debris, they call 'em Sid the Squid, supposed ta be a bench guy for Thorne but he's real bad boss. And when we say bad we mean it- Failed at every mission, every hit, but somehow, the guy pushed Bats off a building an' well, bye bye Bats."

Harley looked up at the goons as they finished, her lips were covered in syrup and a stick of French toast was hanging past her lip like a cigarette,

" Must've been his lucky day, huh! "

She giggled and finished off her French toast, ignorant to Joker's sudden interest.

" Pumpkin? Wanna play dress up? "

" Dress up? As what? " Said Harley, raising a quizzical brow.

Joker later explained that Mr. Debris was of high demand and Hafley can simply just bail him out, so that they can be in possession of the Man Who Killed Batman.

Before either of them could find a flaw in the plan, Harley had already worked herself into her old clothes and was fastening a tight bun. Joker was fumbling through a safe, counting to himself the approximate amount of bail money.

The Clown Prince of Crime ushered Harleen into a dark car, pushed the money and a photo into her palm, and reviewed the plan one more time.

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Harleen walked down the quiet and unfamiliar halls of the prison, her heels clicking in the near silence except for Detective Bullock conversating with Officer Montoya.

She clenched the official bail papers in her hands and observed her surroundings carefully, taking in the several cells and their inhabitants.

The closer she came to Bullock, the more she paid attention to him.

Harleen watched as Detective Bullock walked his way to the cell doors and began to interrogate the inmates' knowledge of the Squid.

" How bout it losers? See anythin tonight? What's the word on the Squid? "

Harleen then studied the men from the distance and down to a small file photo hidden between her fingers. She had to make sure she was picking up the right convict and scanned the approaching cell.

Right when she was able to pinpoint the Squid Harvey Bullock decided to put the squeeze on him, pushing himself to face little Sidney Debris.

" What about you skinny? Got anything to say? "

Harleen sped up her pace, her heels now clicking noisily in the hallway, and cut Harvey off before he could further inquire.

" Ahem- "

She straightened her back and adjusted her glasses, reminiscing her years as a psychiatrist for a split second.

" Excuse me officer, but my client doesn't need ta speak a word for you. "

Harvey looked her up and down, intrigued but serious. He kept his wobbly jaw as still as he could manage and thought of something to say.

" I'm sorry ma'am but -

who exactly are you? "

" Harleen Quinzel, attorney at law. "

And with this, she straightened her back even more rigid, and let her expression fall.

" Now that we've had our introductions if you will. I'd like to receive my client. Full bail has been paid and approved. "

She politely thrust the paper forward towards Bullock, and he looked it over. He hesitantly pulled out his keys and grabbed Sidney Debris by the scruff of his neck.

" Thank you, officer. "

She gave a soft smile in his direction.

" You know, " interjected Harvey, " I feel like I've seen you somewhere before. "

" I served you a subpoena once, it was a small subpoena."

And she left, Mr. Debris trailing at her heels.

She lead the small man towards a dark tinted car, opening the door for him as he quickly stepped inside.

He pulled on his seatbelt and smiled as Harleen adjusted herself in the driver's seat, the little window separating the two of them was closed for the moment yet he still spoke.

" Hey, thanks uh- ma'am.

So, who was it that bailed me out? "

Little did he know that while he had been exclaiming jovially, that the car wasn't moving. In fact, she had been changing from suit to suit, and swiftly her makeup was on.

The window flew back, a scarlet gloved hand sending it flying.

" Well, Joker of course! "

" Oh no, NOT YOU! "

But as soon as he had begun to lunge for the for the door handle, it swung open and two goons stepped in from either side. And another sat in the front, turning to look at him through the window.

" Hiya, Squidy boy, now don't you worry. Boss is gonna have loads of fun with you. "

And Harleen drove off, the squealing tires, Sidney's only cry for help. And they sped off towards the HaHacienda, where a very, very impatient Joker was awaiting them.