Boundless

제 17 장

When we got home, Jae hadn't spoken a word since the doctor confirmed that I was five weeks along. No, the only words he spoke was when he stood off of the stool in the hospital room, and told me he would bring the car to the front. I felt awful. I had not only lied to him, but he had not even spoken a word to me. I found out the same day he did.

I sat on the opposite side of the bed. My back facing him. I looked ahead at the wall. I feel the bed dip, Jae grunts laying on the bed. I bit my lips. I didn't know what to say to him. I lay down and I hugged myself. I know he was upset that I lied, but he didn't seem that happy about my pregnancy either. This made me sad. I was suddenly brought into my own pit of solemn. Was I the only person happy about this? I am terrified of being the only one.

" Jae" I called his name.

" What is it Athena?" It's not what he said, it was how he said. I sat up and a sob escape my lips. I wiped my tears with my wrists and grabbed my pillow. I leave the room and I hear him get up. " Athena wait" He calls for me and I stop in the hallway and turn to him. Tears slip down me eyes. " Jae just leave it alone" I say softly. He wipes my eyes. " How can I leave it alone? You are crying" He says caressing my cheeks.

" You haven't said anything to me since we've left the hospital." My voice wavers.
He sighs and bows his head, he looks back up at me, " I know" He answers.
I wipe my tears and remove his hands.
" Actions speak much louder than any words ever can" I say sternly, turning away from him, he grabs my arm.

" C'mon Athena, don't say that" I ripped his hand off of me. " No Jae! Just be honest with me. You aren't happy that I am carrying this baby, are you?" I asked so boldly. " Baby, that's not why I—-

—-Then what is it? Tell me Jae!" I shouted, tears decorating my cheeks in the most unflattering way. He grasps my shoulders. " Athena, I don't know how to react,Ok? I didn't expect this to happen to us, so suddenly. Athena I am just afraid." His voice breaks and his eyes turn glassy.

" Don't you think that I am too? I am afraid too! Why did you make me feel alone? You didn't say anything to me! I wanted you to comfort me! I wanted you to tell me it would be ok. I know I made a mistake! I know it is me who forgot about taking my plan b. I admit it! I know I lied to you! It's my fault! ok? Please just say something, anything!"

He pulls me into his arms.

" Athena don't cry, I love you and this baby both. I'm not going anywhere you aren't. We are in this together I promise."

•. •. •

Jae's pov.

I had fail as a boyfriend. I promised Athena that I wouldn't make her cry and I did just that. I made her cry and I isolated her. I made her feel like she was in this alone. I was happy that she was having my baby, I truly was. It was not her fault that she was with child, and I don't blame her for it. It wasn't her at all. It was what my father would do once he found out. My father had his minions following me.

My father would go through the most extreme things to make sure he had his way. Although he was quiet now, he would strike soon. It was enough that I was fighting for Athena, now I am going to be a father. I would do everything , withstand everything my father throws my way. This was a big step for both Athena and I both. It has been nothing but a short half a year and It has flew by so quickly.

I would fulfill my promise to Athena. I would love and protect her,and be a father to my son or daughter. A daughter with her round eyes or a son with my killer smile. The thought of my child, calling me daddy, and depending on me as their dad, made me nervous. But when I think about how bright my child's smile will shine, how cute and precious every aspect of their being will glorify my days, I am willing to step up.

Athena will never have to be alone again. My sweet peach in her garden of roses. My love for her ripens every time she calls my name, when she moans for me, when she smiles at me. That woman who I love deathlessly. I am honored to be the one who gives her, her first child. I scowled myself internally for ever having upset her. Mere words couldn't accumulate to the pounding of the drums in my heart to such a rhythmic fashion.

Athena stirs in her sleep and lifts her leg around me. I caress her thigh and smile. She slept so peacefully. She released little purs, her chest rising and falling. I looked down at her exposed stomach. " I love you both" I whisper and I leaned over and kissed her forehead. I put my hand on her tummy, and massaged it in a circular motion. How could I have not known? I smiled widely, this was real.

   I am forever grateful. " Jae? Are you awake?" Athena asks weakly, still in a state of rest and wake. " Go back to sleep my love" I whisper and she says nothing, resuming her sleep. I brought her dress down and hugged her body. Mine. She is mine, she can have all of me, as long as she will always be mine....