-Why am I still here?-Suicidal Izuku\katsudeku

Chapter 3

Midoriya

"But kacchan, im trying to figure out how your explo-"he cut me off.  

"Why won't you shut up! I can control my quirk, it's mine for goodness sakes! From what it looks like you should be studying yours! Just go! Go home! Go do whatever you want! Go die! I don't care! Just stop bothering me!"

I felt tears spring my eyes. My childhood friend just told me to 'go die' ....maybe I can take that into consideration..but for now, I couldn't be there, I ran, I don't know where I was going but I ran. Apparently kacc-bakugou doesn't want my around anymore. I mean I don't blame him. Who really does?..I only have Tenya Iida now.. and my mom. But the pain can go away just as fast as it came right?

I got to a mountain side, there was a deep drop. I sat on the ledge. I broke down. "Why doesn't anyone like me?, why do I have to be the kid who always makes people mad? Did I do something wrong? Why am I still here? Can I just end it!" I whispered it all but the ending sentence.

I cried for about two hours, then I finally thought about going home. It was now dark. I stopped by the store on my way home. I picked up a razor...

I was almost at my house when I noticed the lights were on. I guess moms still awake. I walked in the house, and was greeted by my mom.

"Where were you! It's late." She ran up to me giving me a hug.

"I'm fine mom, just took a detour." I say returning the gesture.

"Okay foods on the stove if you want any." She let me go,and stood in front of me.

"No thanks mom. I'm good." When I said that the words came rushing back to me head. 'Go die!" "Stop bothering me!" "You should be studying yours!"....

"Okay goodnight hunny." I nodded, and went to my room. I put the razor on my desk. Then I sat in the chair. I turned on the lamp light cause it was a bit dark in my room. I sat there for a couple minutes, thinking if I should really do this. I grabbed the razor, and went to the bathroom. I looked around my room and found a small screwdriver. I brought it to the bathroom, and took he screws out of the sides of the razor. It was a six blade razor. I got a blade, and set it aside. Then I got the others, and hid them in my art drawer.

I went back in the bathroom, then I looked myself in the mirror. I picked up the blade then turned on the water. I started to cry thinking of everything I actually have been threw with kacchan, and then for him to tell me this. I put the cold blade on my skin under my wrists. I started to drag it creating long red scars across my wrists. It burned for a while, but then it kinda became soothing. I started to drag it deeper than the last one. This one made a lot of blood come down my arm. It stung, yeah, But I also feel relived.

I made two more deeper then the others, these cut to the meat on my arm. I decided to stop after I did about two or three more. There was a bandage wrap under the sink, I don't know why, but I'm unlacing it now. I wrapped my arm up, then went out, and threw on a long sleeve shirt. I went to bed that night, and slept in pitch black.

***

I woke up, and my arm was throbbing. It hurt, but I could live with it. I got up and threw on my school clothes. I fixed the bandages up to where you couldn't see them. (At least he thought no one couldn't.) when I went down stairs there was a note on the door from my mom.

Izuku hunny, I'm getting groceries, breakfast is in the microwave. Be back some time after you get back from school, I also have other errands to run.'

momma Inko!

I didn't even want to eat, I just left.

***

I sat down in my seat. Bakugou was infront of me. He didn't say anything, so I didn't either. Then the rest of the class came in which was I think, Jirou, Momo, Ashido, and mineta. Then Aizawa was behind them.

"Today we are going to work on seeing how far we can throw this," He held up a baseball. "Who ever throws it the farthest wins." He finished. Then our suits came back out the wall, we all went, and grabbed them. Then Aizawa y'all is to meet him at the back of the school like yesterday. Yesterday...

***

" First up is, Momo." Aizawa yells out making Momo come up to the line he drew with some paint in the grass, for a starting line.

(Score's
Momo-36 yards
Ashido-28 yards
Iida-56 yards
Bakugou-79 yards
-we are going to listen to deku ramble for a sec.-)

If kacchan go 79 yards... that means I will have to do better. But I will break my hand. But if I use only a small part of my body I won't have to break my hand, only the part I used.

(Back to the scores:
Tsuyu-43 yards
Jiro-39 yards
Koda-57 yards
Sero-51 yards
Mineta-21 yards
Midoriya: current.)

I lifted my arm up about to throw. Then I made only the all for one energy go to my finger when I let go at the last second.

"79 yards! You, and bakugou tied." Mr.Aizawa said. While everyone was clapping and giving my 'good jobs' 'congratulations' and more.

"Midoriya, come here." Bakugou yelled from the other side of everyone. He didn't seem happy either.

I walked over. "Yes?" I asked in a shy tone, skated he was going to pumble me into the ground.

"What's this." He grabs my wrist with the bandages on it.

I hissed in pain, his hand was on a deep cut. I tried to play it off like it was nothing. "What? Th-that's just my ha-hand..." I stuttered my words.

"Why is there bandages?" He asked glaring at me for lying.