Chapter 20 - Ethan

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I stared at the case in front of me I had dropped on the coffee table. What was this now? Number six? Eight? Yeah, I think its eight.

Maybe.

I took another gulp from the bottle. The front door swung open, with ferocity. "E, wha--what the hell?" Seth asked, staring at my precarious situation. He pinched the bridge of his nose, exasperated, "Dude, why? You dont drink."

I cocked my head to the side and looked at the Corona bottle in my hand. He was right. I dont drink. Well, I dont now. Nope, that's not true. I am drinking now... whatever. "I lost my grandma, the girl I love and possibly my career all in one week," I shrugged and took another swig, "Seemed like a good idea at the time."

He sighed and plopped down on the couch beside me. I handed him a beer. He obliged. I watched him pop the cap off, bringing it to his mouth. But he stopped just short of drinking it. Titling it towards me, "Women," he indicated a toast.

"Hmp," I exhaled and clicked my bottle against his. I saw him out of the corner of my eye, watching me as I downed the rest of the beer. I tossed it across the room, gently. I really didnt want to have to clean up broken glass. It pinged off the corner chair, causing the leg to fold inward, dented.

I sighed. I would have to add that chair to my list of things I had to fix around this house. But the glass bottle didnt break so... eh, small battles.

"When are you coming back to Chicago?" Seth asked, ignoring the glorious fact that I achieved not having shattered glass to sweep up.

"Dont know." I mumbled as I leaned back into the couch, grabbing another beer on the way. He raised his eyebrows as he brought his drink to his lips.

"Need help?" He asked, looking around the worn farm house. Was he trying to make conversation? Lame.

"Probably." I really hadnt started any projects yet. I had every intention on doing it but I couldnt bring myself to leave with couch. Well, other than to get beer. That seemed important.

He narrowed his eyes at me, "Seriously, man, what are you doing?" He motioned to the Corona case.

"I dont know. I bought limes but I just didnt feel like cutting them when I got home." I smirked, knowing full and well that wasnt really what he was asking. He ignored my weak attempt at a joke, "In all the years I've known you, I've never seen you just roll over and give up."

I nodded. That was true. I had always been persistent. I had always fought for what I wanted until I got it. And I fought hard. But the strange circumstances of this situation had my brain overloaded. Soulmates. Yeah, fuck that. If that was true, why wasnt it easier? Why was she fighting me? Shouldn't she just automatically want to be with me? Shouldn't it tear her up we're apart? I know it did me. I submit into evidence my tenth beer. Or was it nine? Eleven? Ah, fuck, I dont know.

"She doesnt want to be with me, Seth." I said flatly.

"Bullshit!" He exclaimed, a little too loudly, causing me to flinch. I turned to him now, ticked off he shouted at me. Like it should bother me or something. Wait. Did it bother me? I dont know. Or didnt care. Whichever. I think I'm a bit drunk. "That's bullshit and you know it," he shot his arm toward the door, pointing, "She knows it!"

"Does she though? Does she really?" I asked, mocking him. Probably a bad idea but the beer was talking now. And the beer did not realize that Seth could break us like a twig. He snorted and shook his head, "I'll give you two days to get your shit together and get back home and then I'll drag your sorry ass out."

I drunkenly waved my hand at him, "Deal," I said somewhere between a hiccup. I think. Maybe... Or was it a burp?

Hell, I didnt really care.

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I was thankful for a dreamless sleep. I needed a break. But damn. My head was pounding. Eyes still closed, I lazily reached for the clock to see the time. Only to feel beer bottles, clanging together and falling to the floor. I turned my head, squinting one eye open. Oh. That's right. I passed out on the couch. I groaned. Fuck that sun was bright...

I rolled off the couch, knocking more bottles onto the floor in the process. "Shit," I cursed under my breath. I stumbled to the bathroom and splashed some water on my face. I should have known better than to look in the mirror, but the beer must have fried my brain cells.

Staring at myself, worn and still a little tipsy, the reflection brought forth a rage I didn't know I had. What was I doing? Why was here and not with Haven? Had I given up? I never gave up. I sure the hell wasnt going to start now. I never allowed anyone to dictate my happiness and I'll be damned if she gets to. Dont want to see me anymore? Dont want me to contact you anymore? Well people in hell want slurpees, too. Fuck that, Haven. Fuck you.

Not sure where to direct my anger, I punched the mirror. Glass spread like a spider web through my reflection.

I dont know how long I stared at my warped face looking back at me from the mirror. And I dont know how long I would have stayed there, in the same trance, if my bladder hadnt of reminded me it needed to release itself.

The thought of yesterday's Beer Breakdown returned, front and center to my thoughts.

Two days. Seth said two days.

I wasnt sure that was enough time for me to grow a pair and sack up. But I would try. I never gave up.

I was done playing by her rules.

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"HAVEN!" I shouted.

She was gonna talk to me. If I had to stay asleep for the rest of my life then so be it. We were going to work this shit out.

I walked down a sandy beach, screaming her name.

Where was she?

"Ethan," I heard. I spun around, startled. She marched right up to me, with purpose. I prepared myself for the fight that was about to happen.

But as I opened my mouth to speak, she closed it. Pressing her lips to mine.

And in that moment, that quickly, my anger dissipated. All the hurt, all the pain... it was just gone. Every word I had played inside my head, every sentence I wanted to get out just obliterated like dynamite to a rock.

And instead of arguing, I wrapped my arms around her and succumb to her power over me.

Haven, Withstanding -The Traveler Series ✔Where stories live. Discover now