20. Truth.

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One perk of having wealthy parents was my horse, Dakota. The most faithful man I know! He was a magnificent black thoroughbred and I'd had him in my life now for five years and in that time he'd never cheated on me, although I had let him go to stud three times now - he has his needs! It was a beautiful sunny Sunday morning and with only a couple of days left before I headed to Germany I was making the most of the time I could spend riding. I'd been every day since Tuesday, being out in the countryside with Dakota made me forget everything and everyone. After I'd saddled him up I checked my phone one last time before zipping it up in to my pocket, today my notifications were empty. I'd had a few texts from Seb virtually every day up until yesterday, it seemed that staying with him in that motorhome on Sunday night had not been my best move but I was now used to his sudden silences so thought nothing of not hearing from him. He would have been with Emilie to her twelve week scan by now so that would explain his silence. I mounted Dakota, grabbing the reins and we set off on a leisurely pace down a bridleway towards an open field. Once we reached that, we started to gather speed and I pelted across the large open space with a big smile on my face, my boy never failed to make me smile. About an hour later we headed back to the stables, we'd had a good hard ride and I was keen to give Dakota a rub down and let him chill out for the rest of the day in the paddock. My parents also paid for me to keep my boy at these stables where he would be well taken care off while I was away. I had a lot to thank them for. As we approached the bridleway my eyes were caught by a white SUV. My breath hitched in my throat, I knew that the car was an Infiniti, surely to god it wouldn't be Seb would it? I slowed Dakota down some more, taking the time to scan the area. There he was, leaning against the fence not far from my car, watching me come in. What the fuck was he doing here and more importantly how did he know where to find me? I got on to the bridleway and soon entered the yard, Seb came over to meet me.
"Hi Harper." He smiled.
"What the fuck are you doing here?" I asked, staying seated on Dakota. I could tell by Seb's face it wasn't quite the welcome he was expecting.
"Well I'm not here to see the horses." He looked up at me.
"But... but how did you find me?" I stammered, this had been my little sanctuary away from it all, until now.
"I kind of got your address from Jenny on reception." He looked very sheepish.
"What?! She just gave it to you?!" I raised my voice, causing Dakota to move a little.
"Well, she fancies me so it wasn't hard to do." He broke out in to a grin. "Are you going to come down from up there?" He gestured to my horse and I sighed before dismounting.
"How did you find me here though?" I asked, keeping hold of Dakota's reins as though they were of some comfort to me.
"I googled nearby stables after I'd got to your house." He admitted. "That and sat nav." He added.
"You know you're turning in to a stalker don't you." I raised a brow at him and began to lead Dakota to his stable, Seb followed me.
"So this is Dakota?" He asked, ignoring my stalker comment.
"Yes, this is my boy." I smiled as I looked up at my horse and gave him a pat as we walked.
"He's bigger than I expected, but he's an amazing looking horse." He followed me in to the stable which, thankfully, had been freshly mucked out.
"What was you expecting, a pony?" I started to remove Dakota's saddle, undoing the strap under his belly.
"No, not a pony but maybe something a bit smaller." He said. I noticed that he stood back, near the door. Was he frightened of horses? I removed the saddle and placed it over the bottom section of the stable door.
"Are you standing out there or in here?" I asked, I needed to close the door. Seb stepped inside and I swung the door shut with a click and then began removing Dakota's bridle to replace it with a fabric one I used to lead him out to the paddock with. I picked up the soft brush I'd left in here earlier and started to go over him with it. "So you flirted with the receptionist to get my address and then tracked me down to here?" I asked, confirming the details in my mind.
"Yeah, I flew back here yesterday from home." He replied. I looked at him, his face had dropped, he actually looked quite sad. Was that because I hadn't welcomed him here with open arms?
"I'm sorry, I was kind of a bitch to you when I got back." I mumbled as I concentrated on my horse.
"It's ok, I guess it was a shock me turning up here." He replied.
"Why are you here Seb?" I had to ask, it had been on my mind since I'd first laid eyes on him.
"I had to come and see you." He said as I turned to look at him. I turned back to Dakota and finished seeing to him in silence. Once I'd done I opened the stable door and led him back out in to the yard and we walked, with Seb following, to the paddock. I opened the gate and we entered. Seb helpfully closed the gate behind us and watched as I removed Dakota's bridle and let him go. He trotted away from us quite happily and began nibbling on the grass. "Harper, Emillie isn't pregnant." He suddenly blurted out. I looked at him, open mouthed.
"Oh Seb, has she lost the baby? I'm so sorry." I turned to face him. He shook his head at me.
"There was no baby." He looked crestfallen. "It was all a lie to try and get me back." He said, looking at me. I felt a wave of emotions flood through me, anger at her, sadness for him and..... I'm not sure what else I felt. I stepped past him and opened the gate and we left the paddock together. I stopped and looked at his sad face, he looked as though he was on the verge of tears. I pulled him in to my arms and held him tight, feeling him wrap his arms around me and hold me tight also. After a minute I heard him give in and begin to cry, it hit me then just how much he'd come to want that baby.
"Seb. I'm so sorry." I repeated my words and held him with one hand on his back and the other at the back of his neck. We stood like that for a few minutes until he'd calmed down, I felt my anger towards Emilie simmering in the pit of my stomach. How dare she break his heart like that. "Let's go back to my place." I said as he pulled away. I looked at him as he wiped his eyes with the back of his hands, my heart suddenly felt like it was going to burst with love for this man. He nodded his head.
"I'll follow you in my car." He said quietly. We both got in to our own cars and as I drove with him behind me I was constantly trying to evaluate how I felt. The butterflies inside had intensified, I felt a mixture of happiness that maybe we could get back together and then a mixture of sadness for him and guilt that I was already thinking about having him back while he was so clearly tormented over this nonexistent baby.

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