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The evening in our castle was quiet. I tried to avoid the questioning glances given by servants as they awaited my arrival. I know they were waiting for Edmund to appear, but I had left him behind. My heart was beating in unpleasant anticipation of meeting my husband. 

Back in the bedroom my eyes turned to a drawer. I had used it less and less over the days, the contents inside made me question my place. It opened with a faint squeak. A tiny box were all it had, looking lonely and forgotten. I opened it and my heart twisted in pain, I had not experienced before. 

Two white pearls and tiny golden flowers transported my mind back to early memories. So beautiful and special these earrings seemed at the time. Are they now? I wish these jewels still hold the meaning to it's very core. My fingers trace over the every tiny petal - so fragile. I think of how many years or centuries they have endured, seen the hearts broken or maybe none at all.
My own heart breaks thinking about my marriage tumbling apart. Many people and obstacles come at us so often, I start to question myself - for how much longer will we endure? Despite everything I have to remind myself to stay strong and protect, what is dear to me - the lasting life of my family.


A soft knock on a door reminds me I will not be able to stay alone for tonight, rethink the events and sort out my troubled thoughts.

"Welcome back, my majesty." Anna's tiny voice relaxes me. "I will help you prepare for the night."

I nodded, too tired to say a word.
She seemed hesitant to approach me, her timid steps expressing her uncertainty. For her young mind, I knew she can sense, that something was not right. I could feel her glancing over my shoulder.

"What are those? So beautiful!"

"These earrings are the symbol of our love. They have stood the test of time  long before I was in this world or our king. I hope they will last another generation." My eyes became glassy thinking about our future.

"They will do." Here gaze was focused on the jewelry in my palms. "Our king loves you."

"How would you know? You are still so young and inexperienced."

"I have never seen him treat another person the same way he cares about you. I might be young, but my eyes are showing clearly."

"Such a wise girl." I petted her shoulder and gave a warm smile, but deep in my heart I felt sad.


Anna helped me to take off my corset, which was constricting my breathing, like a deadly snake. With her help I could change much faster, than it would be done by myself. The girl was very fast and skilled despite her young age. Her deceased parents had taught her well.

"The king has always been angry and rude. I fear him. Like the day I wore the dress... it was nothing new to me, I had seen him worse."

Anna's voice was quiet and soothing, as she told her thoughts. Her gentle hands brushed over my long hair as she brushed them carefully.

"The blond lady never allowed him to be alone and relax. I know he likes to be alone, then he is the calmest. And now... I no longer fear to live in this house and see our king. We all are very thankful for his change. Only you and lady Murray can make him content."

"Victoria..." I said out loud. "Please, tell me something about her."

"Uhmmm. I haven't seen her much in this house. I was too young to remember. My mom told me she came here more often, but the princess before you, told her to never come again. She is very well mannered and beautiful. King used to spend lots of time together with the lady, talking and sharing stories. She always listened and made him laugh. I like her. She is very kind to me."

"I see... ." I voice hold a defeated tone.

"But I love you so much more, queen Thea."

Anna quickly gave a kiss on my cheek and her small feet carried her away, before I could collect my thoughts and say something.


The night carried on. I could not sleep. When Edmund is going to return?

I didn't wait long, when I heard the door open and soft shuffling of feet returned the tension back in my body. He left the lights off, all the while changing in night's attire. The bed beside me dipped and I felt the warmth of his body next to my anxiety overtaken form.

Edmund exhaled heavily, as if releasing his burden, that has smothered him for too long. His lips and hot breath trailed over my backbone and near my neck sending tingles over my skin and turning my heart in bigger mess, that it was before. Then when I felt his hands get hold of my upper arms, my body tensed and the slight fear of his mental state made me afraid of his next move. I could feel him shaking, the hold on me was strong and uncomfortable, almost to extent of hurting me. Edmund draw my body closer and I couldn't pretend anymore to be sleeping or be alright with his insanity.

"Edmund.... ." My breath got caught in my throat, when he planted a new kiss. It felt like a hungry beast was ready to devour me. "Ss... stop. You are hurting me." His fingers were cutting deeper in my arms.

He mumbled something between his deep breaths.

"Sorry. I just... need... ."

Edmund let go his strong grip, but he kept my body close to his. His heart was beating erratically. I wished to turn around and see his face, but I feared for what I will find.

"Please, give me a hug." I could hear he felt uncomfortable to ask.

I turned around and I was lucky to see nothing. The darkness in the room denied the view of any detail of his face, but I could imagine the emotions he felt, when each word came out unwillingly.

My arms wrapped around his tense chest, the beating of his heart did not cease. It hurt me to see him this way, so emotionally disturbed and out of control. 

"Why did you leave me?"

"I... I was afraid. I thought you were angry about what I did, that I ruined the night."

"It was not you, who ruined it. Also, thank you for taking control. It was about to get very ugly, if you wouldn't had come."

My tears, which I had been holding inside, welled over my cheeks. I felt so hurt by seeing Edmund loose his control over himself once again.

"I was scared...., so scared." I cried in his arms.

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