1994.

25. HONEY MOONS

HONEY
MOONS

SHE NIBBLED AT her bottom lip with jittering teeth — that only made her freak out more, remembering how he hated the small habit of hers. shaking her head, raesun released her lip and started on the skin of her thumb, jimin driving as fast as he could.

jeongguk and yoongi decided to 'take a trip to the meadow on a whim': that's how taeyong put it. apparently they got quite drunk, forgetting about the call hoseok had made and went to have their own fun. god knows what a meadow would do to cease boredom but, drunkards found happiness in even the little things.

jeon jeongguk did have a love for pretty things after all.

the blonde boy driving beside her sighed, "come on, tell me what's wrong."

raesun tucked her ruby locks behind her ears, fiddling with her earring with one hand and hugging herself with her other arm, "i'm on edge. sorry. not quite the same, jimin, i'm not happy about it either."

"it's okay, i just..." he sighed again, pursing his lips in deep thought, "i think you've taken the wrong path. everyone does at one point but... you've lost yourself along the way, haven't you?"

raeusn nodded: the days and nights she had spent crying until rivers seeped her bedsheets, screaming until her throat was raw, drinking until her tongue was burnt — she let her own self down, and she knew that. but what else could she do, when afraid and lost all from being alone? heartbroken and bitter, raesun could only drink and cry some more until eventually, she was numb.

yet, she could still feel the indigo in her heart.

"he's not any better," jimin continued, "the amount of times i had to drag that guy out of bars, away from fights, even out of bed in the morning... he couldn't function, not at first. i don't think he quite knew what to do with himself."

"what changed?" she whispered, switching from her earring to picking at the skin of her thumb.

he bit at his lip and winced, "well... one night he flew into a rage: smashed up a car and ended up in a fight with some big guy. beat him black and blue though, got away without a scratch," jimin raked back his hair, "mind you, i'm pretty sure he was mighty fucked at that time," he quickly got back to his main point, "anyway, ever since then he's been... blank, i guess. very blunt, likes to be alone, wouldn't even look at namjoon without wanting to punch the nearest thing, or someone for that matter."

raesun frowned, "why? what made him so mad?"

jimin shrugged, "i honestly don't know. it could've just simply been his breaking point."

his breaking point.

and if anyone knew anything about jeon jeongguk, his breaking point is a very scary thought.

"what if he doesn't want to see me?" with topic changed, raesun rushed to ask jimin, eyes wild and voice cracked, "what if... what if he hates me?"

jimin stared at her blankly, then raised a humoured brow, "are you kidding me? like, seriously, are you actually asking yourself that?"

raesun whined, "jimin! for fuck's sake, just... reassure me! i don't know—"

"that boy will never not want you," he shook his head, empathy settled in his softened gaze, the car parked and two dark figures in view, "he... well, he won't admit it but i think he loves you. at one point, anyway."

"he loved me?" raesun whispered, eyes focused on the taller figure with his back facing her and leaning against yoongi's car (good old beatrice).

she felt herself start to tear up at that.

that honey boy, of acrylic stains and glossy eyes, of cigarette smoke and sunbeam kisses — he was a twisted euphoria in himself. how could he ever bring himself to love someone? he screamed hate and destruction, never mind love.

jimin smiled, his eyes turned glassy and his lip started to quiver, "why don't you ask him yourself?"

she nodded.

then stepped out the car.

the two figures, now fully visible, turned around and faced her.

"hey jimin, what did hoseok..." it was him, she knew, but she couldn't see that well due to her blurry vision.

she rubbed at her eyes.

and there he stood, in all his glory.

his hair was dyed pitch black, sparkling underneath the sun's caress and split into its side parting. midnight had swarmed him, from his clothing to the dark twinge to his usual coffee sunset orbs, and she found it devastating to see him so glum. his hand, decorated with new tattoos and silver rings, dropped the lit cigarette its fingers once held onto the ground without a care.

it was as if he froze, just as much as she did.

"fucking hell," yoongi whispered from beside him; she forgot he was even there.

jimin gave her a light shove, egging her into a slow walk. yoongi did the same to her lover, his walk taking him further because of his longer legs but he could barely move. but she pushed forward, breaking into a sprint whilst he managed a jog in his tipsy state.

and they collided like fire and ice, like summer heat and a winter's cold breath, like dewfall on a hot morning, and it was beautiful.

she sobbed, feeling her entire galaxy burst into flames and her feet lift from the ground, her arms tight around his neck as was his around her waist.

"is i–it you?" rivers of his broken heart flowed down either cheek of his, soaking into the material of her t–shirt on her shoulder, "p–please, i c–can't... oh my... fuck," he sobbed and it broke her, hearing his smooth voice crack and snap and break just like her own.

her hands scrambled in his new black hair, kissing at his face in every place possible, wiping at his tears but they wouldn't stop. she remembered him as a sinner yet saw him as an angel at that moment in time, thinking of only the starless universe he lived in behind the tattoo ink and strong act, seeing his despair come through in the form of a wistful stare and honey moons melting in his eyes.

"it's me, i promise," she cried, placing either hand on his face, "where were you baby? where w–were you? i woke up, and i couldn't f–find you..."

"t–they told me y–you were dead," he placed her back on her feet yet still kept his grip on her tight: he didn't want to release her in fear she'll disappear with the moon yet again, "i m–missed you, cried for you, p–pleaded for y–you, needed y–you—"

and he interrupted his own words by pulling her towards him, crying into her ruby locks as his eyes forever more let the despair fall onto crushed meadow grass and wildflowers. he didn't quite know what to feel; if this was another cruel dream, he wouldn't know what to do, but it had to be the realest one yet.

"i'm here, 'm sorry, so sorry," she spoke into his sodden shirt, his knees near about giving way, "here, 'm here."

"never le–leave me, please, i can't..." jeongguk broke down, and it seemed to go on for years.

she was back in his arms and that's all that mattered.

forget the mistakes they made and the sins on their minds, they were back together.

but not ready for the worst to come.

— 雨 —

bruh im crying and i wrote this

that shit hurted oof

anyways ,, i hope this was okay?? i hope it satisfied everyone?? i wanted to make sure it was as beautiful as i could make it !!

have a nice day lovelies,
and remember that this story will hurt your feels even more!! (;

love,
starr.