Use Me, Royal Stranger (mxm)

Chapter 9 - The Battles Within (Part I)

Media: Kellan Lutz as Warrior Lance Maskergan

        Alaric all but ran back to his rooms. His long legs propelled him forward rapidly as his one and only goal was to get back to his rooms as soon as he can without stopping. His wolf was pacing madly within him and it was threatening to hurt someone or trash something. Alaric shuddered deeply at the thought of his animalistic urge. But his many years of teachings from his elders kept him from losing his cool front of others and he opted for his sanctuary: His room.

        His muscled frame rushed past many servants in the hallways and Alaric ignored the shocked gasps following each thunderous step he took. He needed to be alone right now to think about what just happened. Or what did not happen. He should have taken his mate right there and then as his own. Alaric cursed under his breath. He needed a strong drink or a long run.

        Reaching his chambers, Alaric bulldozed pass Lance, his personal guard and best friend, ignoring the man's shout of surprise as he passed him. He had no time to tend to someone else's surprise when he himself was struggling to come to terms with his.

        Ripping his shirt off his back as he walked into his inner room, Alaric took several deep breaths to calm his wolf. He must not allow his wolf to take over at this moment. The consequences would be dire. He could sense that his wolf was out for blood, unless he could be close to his mate. Which was at the moment, impossible. All because he had an obligation to the royal family.

        Alaric cursed under his breath. Throwing himself on his bed, he laid an arm over his eyes and sighed deeply. How could this happen? What in moon goddess' name was going on?

        How could Carlen be his mate?!

        Carlen's shocked and distraught face replayed in his mind and Alaric cringed. Alaric did not handle this well. He had acted out of fear for what his royal court and parents wanted for him. He was not ready for the consequences of mating to a male who could not bear him children. Not to mention, he would likely not be able to ascend the throne as he would not be able to father an heir unless he takes a mistress. He could not do that to Carlen.

        Alaric groaned. Perhaps denying Carlen of his mate like that was not a right move either. But what could he do? Alaric was not prepared for this at all. He needed to come up with a plan to placate his parents and the wishes of the royal court, yet not hurting Carlen in the process.

        Not hurting Carlen more in the process. Alaric corrected himself.

        Alaric's heart ached as he thought about how Carlen must have felt when he denied their relationship and walked away from him. It took every willpower and strength that he had to walk away from his collapsed mate.

        Alaric was scared to even say that word now. Did he deserve someone like Carlen to be his mate when he could only hurt him right after they knew about one another? He deserved to be alone for the rest of his life, miserable and hurting for inflicting emotional hurt like that one someone as sweet and innocent as Carlen.

        Alaric's eyes glistened with tears as he thought about what Carlen must feel now, being denied their relationship as mates. Of course he had not rejected Carlen officially, but he had not given Carlen any hope that they had a chance together either. He messed up.

        Alaric felt his palms sweating profusely as he realized that he could truly lose Carlen completely. Panic rose and swelled within him as he tried to think of ways he could correct this mistake.