Cuts and Coffee - Isak Valtersen

~ Emaciated ~

»Please don't talk no bullshit.
We are stars, as far as you know.
Sunbeams are hitting me like envy,
and I am bathing in it currently.«

His arm was burning like hell.
After the shower it had started to bleed twice as intense, his hoodie was pretty much ruined now.
Isak sighed. If the bleeding didn't stop soon, would he had to get help? What could happen if he didn't get help?
He decided to treat this problem like the rest of his problems - shrugging it off, sleeping it off and drinking it away.
While listening to some music, Isak got ready for a day out with the boys.

The small, yellow bottle of Nesquick cocoa milk seemed almost more fragile than Isak while the seventeen-year-old walked down the streets of Oslo.
The pre-game was at 6 pm, they'd be having it at Jonas' place.
Isak walked up the stairs to Jonas' flat. He lived there with his parents.
After knocking a few times, a freshly washed Jonas opened him the door.
A quick exchange of "halla's" followed, before Isak put his shoes away.
Mahdi and Magnus were already there, drinking beer and enjoying joints.

"How's it going, Isak?", Magnus asked after a while.
Isak had feared that question. He swallowed his saliva a few times to gain some time before he cleared his throat.
"Um, bra, I guess. Good, yeah", Isak mumbled, slowly adjusting his red snapback for the millionth time.
Magnus took another sip of his beer.
Jonas noticed Isak's sad facial expression.
"Du, hey, tell me what's up", he said, gently stroking Isak's shoulder.
The bottle of beer in Isak's hand was empty again.
"Well, there has been a lot on my mind lately", Isak mumbled, his eyes were focused on his hands.

Jonas' brown eyes looked at him in a confused way.
"Hva? What do you mean exactly?", Jonas asked, feeling like there was more.
The seventeen-year-old sighed deeply.
"Eh, well, I've been feeling pretty down lately. That's pretty much it", Isak said, feeling uncomfortable with talking about his problems.
The joint in his left hand made a few more turns around his fingers before Isak began to smoke it.
Smoke was pooling into his lungs, tickling his insides and his mind. Slowly, Isak exhaled the smoke through his nose.
"Whatever it is, it's going to be okay. Alt blir bra igjen", Jonas said before he talked to Mahdi.
Everything will be alright. Yeah, Isak didn't know if he could believe that.

"Romantics" by Trove Lo and Daye Jack played in the background, Mahdi had brought his JBL box with him.
Isak's thoughts were spinning around in his head.
"Guys, I'm heading back home", Isak said, it was around 9 pm and the others wanted to go to some party now.
"Um, okay. See you at school on Monday, Isak", Jonas said and the others said goodbye to him as well.
Oslo was dark and cold, so Isak hurried up.
Since he wasn't living at home anymore, he tried to be at home before midnight.
His friend Eskild had offered him a place to stay, back when he ran away from home.

Flashback
"Dad stop! You're hurting me!"
"Do you seriously think I care? Look what you've done to our family! It's your fault that your mom's going crazy! You're insane yourself!", Isak's dad screamed.
His grip around Isak's throat tightened. Isak grunted in pain, as far as that was possible.
His father usually beat him or hit him, but he had never ever attacked him.
But now he was angry about Isak's second suicide attempt.

Isak had slit his wrists.
Thank god he got rushed to the hospital on time, he passed out before his mother found him.
Now his dad was yelling at him for attempting suicide for the second time.
Isak tried to block out the harsh words of his dad.
Before Isak passed out, his dad let him drop to the ground.
It was the same night in which Isak decided to run away from home.
It made him sad to leave his sister behind, but he felt like it [running away from home] was the only thing that could keep him sane in this insane world.