Before Anything Else (Absinthe Series 2)

Wakas

W a k a s

A person could grow if he sensed a feeling of belongingness. Nararamdaman ng isang tao na nabibilang siya kung ang mga tao sa paligid niya ay tanggap siya sa kung ano siya. Some people feel that they belong because they had the same experiences, the likes and dislikes. Ngunit may ibang mga tao na nararamdamang nabibilang sila dahil kinalakihan na nila. Iba-iba sa bawat tao, but what's more important than belongingness? I think it was acceptance and love.

I grew up with a feeling of being incomplete. Pakiramdam ko noon nababagay na ako sa lugar kung saan ako lumaki but as things change and I notice how my mother treats me differently, naramdaman kong baka nga hindi ito ang lugar kung saan ako nararapat.

I've loved them even though it felt like they are just obligated to love me back, especially her. Naging masaya ako sa piling nila kahit na maraming bagay ang ipinipilit na ipagawa sa akin. Minahal ko sila kahit na nahihirapan ako. I did everything. Inuna ko sila bago ang ibang bagay.

And then, I met Eion. He made me feel special and above everything. He made me feel complete and slowly, he was bringing up all the pieces of my heart and glued everything, from edges to edges. He was my captor. I am the lost bird without freedom. Eion caught me and freed me from everything that's holding me back. Ipinaramdam niya sa akin na kailangan kong mabuhay ayon sa gusto ko at hindi sa gusto ng iba.

" Are you ready?" Eion whispered to me as we reached the familiar house I abandoned six years ago. I feel nostalgic seeing the wealthy rose bushes, the old portico and the same neighborhood. Hindi ko alam kung may oras pa ba ako para maalala ang lahat ng karanasan ko sa lugar na ito.

I held his hand. He was warm and we fit together. Hinigpitan niya ang hawak sa akin at sabay kaming naglakad papasok. Every step was a battle. Hindi ko kasi alam kung ano ang magiging reaksyon kapag nakita sila. I am afraid they'll push me away seeming that only Ava knows that I am coming today. Eion was kind enough to contact Ava. At totoo ngang wala silang alam sa nangyari. Ava was afraid to tell them kasi nga alam niya ang magagawa ni Mommy. Hindi naman ako galit kasi alam ko namang nadala lang din sa takot si Ava.

Si Eion ang kumatok sa pinto. I looked everywhere but the door. Natatakot ako sa magiging reaksyon nila. The door rumbled. Gumawa ito ng ingay dahil sa kalumaan. Nang bumukas ito, una kong narinig ang malakas na boses ni Avi.

Fuck, I don't think I could do this.

Akmang aalis ako nang hinila pabalik ni Eion. He was staring back at me. Ngumiti lamang siya at tumingin sa unahan. Sinunod ko siya at unang nakita ang mukha ni Alderidge. He looked matured. Mas lalong bumagay sa kaniya iyon lalo na at palagi itong masungit at mukhang mayabang.

His eyes widened when they landed to me. His lips parted to speak but no sound came out. Tipid akong ngumiti at mas lalong kumapit kay Eion.

" Dridge sino ba 'yan?" it was Algernon's deep voice. Hindi agad nakasagot si Dridge. He took a step forward. Binitawan naman ni Eion ang aking kamay at bahagya akong itinulak. I looked back at him, hesitant to even approach Dridge.

" What the fuck?" I heard someone cursed ngunit huli na dahil naramdaman ko ang higpit ng yakap ni Dridge sa akin. My heart burst with so much warmth. Naramdaman ko ang mainit na likido sa aking pisngi. It dropped suddenly to Dridge's shirt.

" Oh my god! Forah!" it was Avi's high pictch voice. The next thing I knew, they surrounded me. Ramdam ko ang higpit ng yakap nila sa akin. I sobbed hard. Kahit si Avi ay napaiyak pati na rin sina Kaedelle.

" Ava told us everything. I can't believe na pinaniwala lang kami nina Tito na kasama ka nila in all these years! Dapat ay nagtaka na kami kung bakit kada balik nila dito ay wala ka. They said you were busy with law school kasi mahirap sa Harvard. Oh my god!" Niyakap ulit ako ni Avi at doon umiyak nang umiyak. The guys smiled at me.