Goodbye Carter

t w e l v e

December 1st, 2014

I MISS YOU.

The blue screen glares back at me with the three words that I had been waiting to hear for the past month, but somehow I didn't feel a single thing when I read it over.

Aiden's text wasn't completely unexpected, as I could tell from his longing looks and moody attitude that he was reaching his wit's end- just like me. Yet, that didn't change a thing for me. It had been just under a month since Aiden and I had truly acted like a couple. Sure, we talked and kept in contact; but we were limited to an awkward small talk with each interaction, filled with stiff "how are you's?" and "the weather, right?"

I felt like I lost a piece of myself. Not only because I seemed to be loosing my boyfriend, but because I was loosing my best friend too. At first it was an impossible task to keep myself together at school, which I'll admit sounds dumb... But I felt like I was falling apart. I had absolutely no idea what would happen if Aiden and I broke up. For starters, it would completely split apart our friend group... and I couldn't even imagine Aiden and I's level of interaction after that.

To be honest, being with Carter helped. We had begun working on our film project tirelessly as soon as we received the assignment. Both of us were fully aware that having a video featured on the district website would be a strong addition to our college applications in the future. Frankly, it seemed like nothing had changed since sophomore year when we first met. Carter and I just clicked perfectly together. We were so different, yet so similar at the same time.

I hadn't met anyone like that since Adien.

I would've liked to hear that about a month ago, Aiden.

I text back, my fingers flying over the keyboard furiously. Feeling slighted by the fact that Aiden thought it was okay to ignore me for weeks and then finally text me when he needed me.

I'm sorry, I just needed some time to think about things.

I roll my eyes. I knew what "time" meant. That cocky son of a bitch couldn't imagine a world without every girl being hopelessly love with him.

Time my ass.

Can we talk... please?

I sigh, feeling my anger slowly dissipate. He was hurting, I could tell.

On the phone... or?

No, I think we should talk in person.

Playground? 10 minutes?

I opt to suggest our usual meeting spot since middle school. We both used to sneak out on school nights and meet at the small playground that sat about four blocks away from both of our houses. We used to swing aimlessly on the creaky, old, swing set and eat junk food we smuggled from the back of our pantries.

How times have changed...

Sounds good.

I quickly pull on my winter coat and Ugg boots over my baggy sweatpants and stained sweatshirt before throwing my hair up into a messy bun and making my way out the front door. I make sure to leave a note for my parents, just in case they freak out and accidentally call the police to report me as a missing child.

Yeah, I didn't want to go through that... again. Don't ask, it's a long story.

As I reach the sidewalk on the other side of my street, I start my trek. Pulling my coat closer to my body as a chilly winter breeze passes over the silent street. I could barely see where I was going, receiving no help from the flickering street lights paired with the light dusting of snow on the ground.