Please // Matty Healy

the seventeenth

A/N: Did someone say George's POV? No? Oh well, you're getting some anyways. 

________

Jess's POV: 

It was good at first.

In the beginning, I devoted myself to my studies and used my canvasses as a coping mechanism when I felt lonely. 

In the beginning, Matty called often, and I liked to paint the way my heart would flutter every time I heard his voice again.  We would talk for hours on end. Now, he was on tour and had less time for me.

In the beginning, George would tell me how well Matty was doing. Now, he would give brief open-ended responses like "he's trying to cope". I knew Matty's former coping mechanisms, and I prayed he'd find another way. 

In the beginning, I enjoyed spending time with my professor and hearing his stories of young love and travel over a glass of wine. Now, I missed having friends my age and I girl like Kai to crack jokes about dumb things and make life simple. 

In the beginning, I thought I could last six weeks on my own. Now, I longed for someone to tell my cool stories to or share my accomplishments with. I wanted someone to celebrate with me when things were good, yet hold me tightly when I missed Matty the most. With him, regardless of where we were, I was home. And right now, I was feeling very homesick. 

I had about an hour of free time before dinner tonight with a dutch impressionist artist. I figured I'd make the most of my time, pulling out my phone to call Matty. 

It rang continuously until I felt myself begin to lose hope. Suddenly, the ringer cut out and I heard some fumbling with what sounded like a party in the background.

"Hey, now's not the best time love," Matty stammered, his voice sloppy, as though he was struggling to speak clearly. 

"O-oh, okay, sorry" I sighed.

"Who's that?" an unfamiliar female voice spoke to Matty.

"It's nothing, I'll be right there," Matty slurred back.

I could feel my heart plummet. 

"Matty are you okay?" I asked, fearful of his response.

"Everything's fine, I've gotta go" he spoke.

"Okay, I love you" I said.

"Bye," he responded, hanging up quickly.

I wanted to scream. I wanted to cry. Concern riddled my thoughts, and I figured I'd call George to make sure Matty was okay.

No answer.

I tried Kai.

"Hey girl," she cheered. I smiled. Finally, someone, I could talk to.

 "Hey, are you guys at a party right now?" I asked.

"I wasn't aware of any party, I'm just in my hotel room about to head out for a cocktail," she spoke.

"Oh, do you know where Matty is?" I asked, hating how desperate I sounded.

"No I haven't seen him today, why?" she asked

"It's just...  when I called him it sounded like he was with a bunch of people and was speaking strangely" I spoke softly.

"He's probably just drunk at some random party he'll forget in the morning, that sounds like him. Well at least, him before he met you. Anyways, I wouldn't stress too much about it, you should be focusing on Paris!" she cheered, however, I couldn't find it in me to be too happy.