MILES APART

☸21☸

MY HEART SPILLS-7

Having a life in you is the best feeling in the world. When your unborn child, curls in the safety of your womb, it feels like an accomplishment. When it kicks you from inside, it feels it is knocking on your door, asking if it could come out. Whenever you feels something, it looks like your child is feeling it. The home your womb makes for it is like it's wandering place, as it rolls inside.

And all this while, I felt heavenly.

Of course I became grumpy, paranoid, scared for all those hormones in me flowed like a river.

When our doctor asked if we want to know the gender of our kid, we straightaway refused, rather I did.

Xavier was quiet sure it's a daughter while I had mixed feelings.
"Mr. Xavier! It can be a boy too!", Doctor argued as Xavier put forward his theory without any ultrasound.
"Doctor I am her father! I know better than anyone.", He answered quite rudely.
"Mr. Xavier...You never know!"
"You never know doctor! I do!", I had to interrupt with another topic to stop there argument.

My reports were very good and doctor said the baby is healthy and has an appropriate weight and height.

I was content with everything around me. After the storm, that turned my life upside down, things went back to tolerable.

He was always around me...Or I should say us.
He didn't complain when I resumed working from home. However, me working for Ry made a permanent scowl plastered on his face. Not to forget, the one sided talks he used to do with me were stopped. But temporarily.

I was scared when Ry offered me to join work again because the abrupt stop in my monthly novel edition did cost him alot. And so I decided to help.

What Xavier will think did bother me, but I decided to ignore that thought. Even he didn't think about me. Why should i!?

In those times, I felt a certain fear in my heart.
Even after accusing me for such a shameful thing, he is with me. For what!? Of course for the baby.
The moment I deliver the baby, the little tolerance we created, or I should say the reason he was bearing me for will be over. And so may be that will be the final end of us.

He cares for me for his child is in my womb. But will he do the same once he gets the child!?

Meanwhile I saw how he lives now.
He skipped most of his meals. Either busy in his office work, or researching about pregnancy and making me feel better.

The same happened that day and as much as I would hate to admit, the thought didn't settle well with me.
I know I can't stop caring about him. Thats one of my flaws.

So, when I was making food for myself, I decided to make some for him too.
That would be my first act of kindness towards him after those fateful incidents.

When I finished cooking, I took deep breaths. I haven't stepped in his penthouse since I left it then.
But keeping a stone on my heart, I stepped in.
A rush of agony washed me.
This place was no more my home!

But the self control I learnt all these months helped and I went in.
He was working on his couch and believe me, I literally fainted when I looked around the place that used to be my home.
Wonder why!?

This place, that I left in such a good state, was turned into a mess.
God!
His suits, shirts, shoes lying all over the place. Dumbbells scattered on the floor. Polybags of takeouts were scattered here and there.
Curtains hanging lifelessly, pillows falling off the sofa, my house was looking like a garbage bin!