Forever Riddle (Willow style) DISCONTINUED || Harry Potter ||

15 - My mind is less mine than I would like

When we arrive at Grimmauld place, I pull away from the others just as someone begins speaking.

"Back again, the blood-traitor brats. Is it true their father's dying?"

"Kreacher!" I yell. "Out of this room immediately!" Then I feel shocked. Where did this anger come from?

I stand up and glance around, noticing that we have ended up in the kitchen and Grimmauld Place. The only light comes from the fireplace and a single spluttering candle. Kreacher is disappearing through the door to the hall and Sirius is hurrying towards us all, looking anxious. He is unshaven and still in his day clothes; there is also a whiff of stale drink about him.

"What's going on?" he asks, stretching out a hand to help Ginny up. "Phineas Nigellus said Arthur's been badly injured -"

"Ask Harry," says Fred.

"Or Eva, I want to hear this for myself," adds George.

"It was -" Harry begins, "I had a - a kind of - vision."

"We were asleep before that, but this wasn't a dream."

And we tell them all that we have seen, though he alters the story so that it sounded as though he watched from the sidelines as the snake attacked, rather than from behind the snake's own eyes. I don't bother with the alteration.

Ron, who is still very white, gives Harry a fleeting look, but does not speak. When we finish, Fred, George and Ginny continue to stare at us for a moment. I think that maybe theose particular looks are a bit to accusatory.

"It's not our fault!" I nearly yell, catching myself before I say it outloud. I don't manage to stop the phrase going legmatic, however, and most of them wince, unable to decipher it. Sirius glances at me sharply, however.

"Is Mum here?" says Fred, turning to him.

"She probably doesn't even know what's happened yet," says Sirius. "The important thing was to get you away before Umbridge could interfere. I expect Dumbledore's letting Molly know now."

"We've got to go to St. Mungo's," says Ginny urgently. She looks around at us; we are of course still in our pajamas. "Sirius, can you lend us cloaks or anything?"

"Hang on, you can't go tearing off to St. Mungo's!" says Sirius.

"Course we can go to St. Mungo's if we want," says Fred, with a mulish expression. "He's our dad!"

"No! You can't!" I say loudly, but Fred ignores me, focussing on Sirius.

"And how are you going to explain how you knew Arthur was attacked before the hospital even let his wife know?"

"What does that matter?" says George hotly.

"It matters because we don't want to draw attention to the fact that Harry is having visions of things that are happening hundreds of miles away!" says Sirius angrily. "Have you any idea what the Ministry would make of that information?"

I noticed that. Am I not important?

Fred and George look as though they can't care less what the Ministry make of anything. Ron is still ashen-faced and silent.

Ginny says, "Somebody else could have told us... we could have heard it somewhere other than Harry."

"Like who?" says Sirius impatiently. "Listen, your dad's been hurt while on duty for the Order and the circumstances are fishy enough without his children knowing about it seconds after it happened, you could seriously damage the Order's -"

"We don't care about the dumb Order!" shouts Fred.

"It's our dad dying we're talking about!" adds George at an equally high volume.

"But-" I begin.

"Your father knew what he was getting into and he won't thank you for messing things up for the Order!" Sirius interrupts, equally angry. "This is how it is - this is why you're not in the Order - you don't understand - there are things worth dying for!"

"Easy for you to say, stuck here!" bellows Fred. "I don't see you risking your neck!"

The little color remaining in Sirius's face drains from it. He looks for a moment as though he would like to hit Fred, but when he speaks, it is in a voice of determined calm."I know it's hard, but we've all got to act as though we don't know anything yet. We've got to stay put, at least until we hear from your mother, all right?"

Fred and George still look mutinous. Ginny, however, takes a few steps over to the nearest chair and sinks into it. Harry and Ron follow her, and, after a minute of glaring at Sirius, the twins copy.

"That's right," says Sirius encouragingly, "come on, let's all... let's all have a drink while we're waiting. Accio Butterbeer!"

Ooh! Butterbeer! God how I've missed that!

Sirius raises his wand and half a dozen bottles come flying towards us out of the pantry, skid along the table, scattering the debris of Sirius's meal, and stop neatly in front of us.

We all drink, and for a while the only sounds are those of the crackling of the kitchen fire and the soft thud of our bottles on the table.

And it is no good telling myself that by raising the alarm I ensured that Mr. Weasley was found, because there is also the inescapable business of who had attacked Mr. Weasley in the first place.

I savour the butterbeer, before becoming aware of a rising nasuea that has me rushing to the bathroom. Don't be stupid, you haven't got fangs, I tell myself, trying to keep calm as I empty my guts down the toilet bowl. Wiping my mouth, I flush it and gulp some more butterbeer to take the taste away.

But then, what just happened in Dumbledore's office? I felt like I wanted to attack Dumbledore, too...

Be calm Eva, Father's voice vibrates through my head, bringing with it a darkening at the corners of my vision.

You may be the heir of Slytherin, but you are not a snake. The anger was just an after-effect. You are fine. And don't tell Albus I was here this time. I... miss you.

"Fawkes!" says Sirius, loud enough that I can heard it. I hurry back and find Fred halfway along the corridor. I enter the room in time to hear Sirius speak again. "That's not Dumbledore's writing - it must be a message from your mother - here -"

He thrusts some parchment into George's hand, who rips it open and reads aloud: "Dad is still alive."