Never Be The Same {SCOROSE}

Chapter 17 - Rose [UPDATED]

"We're barely hanging on"

Our N.E.W.T.s were all finished, but there was one week left until the end of the term. Ten days left until the graduation ball that would mark the official end of our time at Hogwarts. By this point, most people in my year had complete certainty about what their lives would look like when they left the walls of this school. They had universities, internships, or jobs waiting for them — things they had secured weeks or months ago. I, meanwhile, had no idea what the future was going to hold, and it was wrecking my sanity.

A month ago, I could have said with complete certainty what my life would look like after graduation. My parents had encouraged me to apply to a Muggle university in London — it wasn't commonly done, but they were able to pull some strings with their friends at the Ministry to get my transcripts and such in order. My marks were high, and I'd been easily accepted — I was going to major in political science and minor in literature. I was going to live with my cousin Molly, who had a flat within walking distance of the campus. I was going to graduate at the top of my class and get a good job at the Ministry of Magic. I was going to do things there, great things, things that would make people see me as much more than Ron Weasley and Hermione Granger's daughter. And now...

Now, I was going to have a baby.

As I swiped on a light layer of lip gloss and stood back to observe myself in the mirror, that fact was all I could think of. Don't get me wrong, I looked fine. I looked good. My vibrant hair was half up/half down, with wavy strands of red framing my face. My eyes were sparkling like I was happy. The t-shirt I wore was cute and comfortable, jet black with bright yellow sunflowers ringed around the ends of the sleeves. It was half tucked into a pair of short-but-not-too-short denim shorts, which I'd pinched from Lily. My feet weren't visible in the mirror, but I had on a pair of new white sneakers that were an early graduation present from Lysa. Yes, to anyone looking, I would look good. But I knew things they didn't.

I knew that I'd chosen the shirt because it was one of the looser ones I owned. I knew that I'd swiped the shorts because Lily wore a size larger than me, and most of mine from past summers didn't fit me now. I knew that a few months from now, none of it would fit me at all — probably not even the shoes. And I knew that I was woefully unprepared for all of it.

Someone was knocking on the door to the dormitory. "Rosie? Andy's asking for you. Should I let him in?"

I bit my lip, tasting lip gloss and shame. Andy's asking for you. Tonight was the last time he ever would. "Let him wait," I called back to her, trying to make my voice sound cheerful. "I'll be down in just a moment."

Glancing over myself once more, I took a shaky breath and grabbed the only thing I needed to bring: the Hufflepuff jumper that I'd taken from Andy the first day we were together. As my hands clutched the soft fabric, I found I was blinking tears out of my eyes, and exhaled determinedly. Stop crying, Rose. It's no one's fault but yours.

When I was certain I wasn't in danger of starting to cry the moment I saw him, I slipped out the door and down the stairs, praying to whatever gods existed that we'd both make it through the night without any fatal wounds.

---

"Do you have a dress picked out for the graduation ball?"

I raised my eyes at my boyfriend. "You do realise that we girls plan these things out three to six months in advance, right? We have to do a bit more than slap on the same dress robes we've been wearing to every minorly fancy event since we were thirteen."

Andy chuckled, reaching out to wrap his arm around my shoulders and draw me close to him as we continued walking towards the castle. "So what I'm hearing is... yes?"