Player 2

Skull Smashed

Victims: Daisy, Luigi, Toad, Toadette, Mona, Wario, Bowser, Kamek, Pauline, Boo, DK, Bowser JR

Suspects: Mario, Waluigi, Peach, Rosalina, Ludwig, Lemmy, Wendy, Roy, Morton, Iggy, Larry, Diddy, Dixie, Koopa, Birdo, Yoshi

A sledgehammer was raised, the victim quivered in their sleep, unaware of their murder weapon looming over their head like an ash cloud over a volcano. The hammer wouldn't be so threatening in other circumstances, such as breaking ice blocks, but when it's being held over the head of someone by a murderer with a psychopathic grin painted on their face, it's an object of terror.

Player 2 brought down the hammer onto Diddy Kong's head. It tore through his skin, shattering the skull and spraying brain matter and blood across the room. It was a shame the Kongs had died such terrible deaths. Player 2 didn't intend for it to turn out that way, it was just fate. Fate was fate and that was that. Diddy hadn't had time to register the impact before the lights shut off forever and he drifted into a land of peace. A land free of the bloodshed. A land free of the wrath.

Player 2 grinned down at the corpse before beginning to crawl back through the vents, clutching the sledgehammer in one hand and crawling with the other. It was the one flaw in vent transport. You couldn't stand up because footsteps were too loud so you had to crawl. And crawling with a fucking sledgehammer was difficult. Especially as you were trying not to get blood on your clothes whilst lugging an iron sledgehammer through a vent. A murderers life wasn't chaos, it was careful planning and executing of plans flawlessly. Player 2 was smart enough to have never gotten blood on them during any murder. They were the perfect serial killer. And they fucking knew it.

Dixie Kong turned over to her boyfriend, nuzzling his cheek. She felt something sticky on his cheek so she opened her sky-blue eyes to check what it was. Congealed blood coated the pillow, his face, her face, their bed. Blood was everywhere. His head was smashed open. Dixie lay there, stunned, before grasping hold of the situation and jumping out of the bed. She didn't scream. Her mouth opened and closed like a goldfish, making choked, strangled, sobs. Her vocal chords weren't letting her create the sound her brain wanted her to. 

She ran out of the room, barrelling into Peach as she walked past. Peach stumbled back into the wall as Dixie cried into her dress. 

"Dixie! What's going on?" Peach asked, stroking the sorrowed girl's blonde hair. 

Dixie's voice couldn't force the words out. She grabbed the princesses' arm and dragged her into the room. Peach's gloved hand flew to her mouth, the sight of brain matter sprayed across the room making her slightly nauseous. She let out a quiet scream, but it was enough to alert Koopa who was lurking around the corner.

Koopa rushed in, expecting to see the sight he did. He wasn't fazed in the slightest. Koopa was numb to the sight of mutilated corpses. The sight of Diddy Kong's smashed in skull had no effect on Koopa.

"Koopa, get somebody to retrieve Diddy's body. I'll take care of Dixie." Peach ordered, the reasons why she was chosen as the kingdom's ruler being evident.

Koopa didn't respond, he just drifted out of the room and down the stairs to where he knew Mario would be. Koopa watched everyone. He knew everything. Koopa knew that Waluigi and Rosalina had teamed up in order to either solve the murders or commit the murders. The pair were sneaky enough to hide which one it was, though. No one ever knew Koopa was there. No one knew he was watching. No one would ever know he was watching.

He wandered into the discussion room to exactly what he knew he would find. Mario sat in a chair, his head in his hands as he rethought and rethought his life over and over again in a never-ending cycle of dread. Mario's mental state had really gone downhill since the second he stepped into this house.

Mario lifted his head out of his hands and stared at Koopa with an irritated look. "What?" he snapped.

"Corpse." Koopa said, drifting back out of the room as quietly as he came in.

This snapped the red plumber-turned-detective-turned-example-of-depression out of his irritation and back into 'bad detective mode', as Koopa so kindly called it. He followed the messenger out of the room and to the crime scene. Dixie was still in shock. Peach had remained by her side, smoothing over the trauma in the motherly way she always dealt with things. 

Mario's eyes flitted over the body. Diddy looked so peaceful, even with his skull caved in and congealed blood marring his face. He must have never seen the blow coming. He turned to Dixie, suspicion brewing inside him like fresh coffee. 

"Dixie, did you see or hear the murder taking place?" Mario asked as he knelt down in front of the grief-riddled girl.

"N-no." she stuttered, wiping her eyes with the back of her hand and locking eyes with Mario.

"Holy shit, sledgehammer skull isn't something I thought our psycho would do." Waluigi said from the doorway. Rosalina could be seen standing behind him, surveying the scene. 

"Why do you think it was a sledgehammer?" Mario asked, diverting his gaze to the other man.

Waluigi moved over to the corpse, taking a pencil out of his pocket and beckoning Mario over. Not just Mario walked over to the pencil-wielding, self-proclaimed weapons expert. Everybody in the room wanted to analyse his diagnosis.

"You see, there's a defined rectangular shape where the blow landed. They only hit once. Sledgehammers are heavy as fuck so this murderous bastard can haul one of them through this huge-ass place and then back again." he said, waving his pencil around a distinct rectangle in Diddy's skull.

"So, if they dragged it back, wouldn't there be blood on the floor?" Rosalina asked, glancing at the floor. 

"Yeah, there's blood. Everywhere." Waluigi said, gesturing to drips of blood leading to the vent, "They carried it on their shoulder over to the vent, and then most likely dragged it through." 

"Have I just been doubting your detective and pathologist skills this whole time?" Mario muttered, half to himself and half to Waluigi.

"You have, but then building a pathologist or detective career in these circumstances isn't considered great." he replied, picking up the corpse and starting to walk out of the room.

"I'll help with that," Rosalina said, gently holding Diddy's fucked up head in her hands. They left, leaving an empty silence hanging in the air.

Mario turned back to Dixie, who was looking stunned by the whole ordeal.

"Dixie, before we were interrupted by the slightly insane 'pathologist', you said that you heard and saw nothing, despite sleeping right next to Diddy. How? Surely you must have woken up or something because of the noise." he said. Dixie shook her head, pushing her hair back from where it had fallen over her bloodshot eyes.

"So you're saying that you slept through the murder of your boyfriend, despite being right next to him, or you killed him and are a very convincing liar. Which one is it, Dixie?" Mario said, his voice turning harsh.

"Mario-" Peach began.

"Shush, don't intervene with my business." Mario interrupted her. Peach slunk back to the corner, her head hanging low, like a puppy that had been kicked to the side.

"I didn't kill him!" Dixie said, bolting out of the room with tears streaming down her cheeks. 

Koopa watched the scene unfold from his corner. Peach looked dejected, upset she couldn't please her boyfriend. Mario was cruel. That was the side no one except people as observant as Koopa saw. 

He watched as Mario stormed out of the room and Peach trailed after him. Koopa watched everything.