ʜ ᴏ ʟ ʏ

46.

As much as she didn't want to admit it, leaving Keila's house was necessary for her mental health and stability. Keila was her friend, Bonnibel was her lover, but not only was being around them putting them in harms way, but draining considering her emotional state. Of course the thoughts of Ash ravaged her mind and always would, and the closest she could get to getting him out of her head was finding herself first. Time spent desolate away from Bonnibel would mean something, and she promised her that. Marceline would return to her in times due a better person, ready to move past this life changing event and towards better days. Marceline didn't exactly know where she was going after setting foot out the trailer park, but nonetheless she walked. Summer coming closer and closer to its closure, the heat wasn't much of heat, more of a luke warm mix with the coming winter. Even with the slight breeze Marceline was still sweating uncontrollably. She was nervous, picking at her fingers to avoid visibly shaking, walking down the side of a barren road with no destination. She had no idea where she would sleep that night, no idea when she would eat, no idea how she'd make money. She could've gone on like that for the rest of the night, letting the brain consuming questions eat away at her until she was nothing, if it weren't for a presence next to her. Marceline halted her nervous jitter and turned to the road where a car eased by her side. A very familiar car. She wasn't surprised to see a face she had grown accustomed to pop out the window. "Marceline?" Guy questioned, looking rather caught off guard to find his friend on the side of the road. Marceline gave him her attention, abandoning her nervous tactic to stare at him in the passengers seat, Bongo in the drivers. "Hey guys." She croaked out awkwardly, this scenario the last one she expected to happen. Guy hung out the window with bent posture, taking in his friends appearance, coming to the conclusion that something just wasn't right. Her growing mane was tustled, ruffled atop of her head and dipping into her face, the glimpse of her eyes he could catch was different to say the least. Under her nervous glance were bags shaded one shade darker than her skin tone, like she hadn't slept in a while. Her beady grey eyes refused to meet his directly. He deemed her behavior unordinary. "Marcy what are you doing out here alone man? You know creepers down here will snatch you up off the side of the road any chance they get." Marceline rubbed her neck uncomfortably, trying her best to mask her failed efforts with a encouraging smile. It ended up as a unpleasant smile she regretted as soon as it formed her face. "Uh yeah I know. I skipped town. Shit got a little crazy back there and I left. I don't think I plan on going back anytime soon." As much as he wanted to mention Bonnibel, he refrained. Leaning forward and pressing against the steering wheel to peer at his friend, it was now Bongo's turn to speak. "Well don't you have a place to crash? I know Keila well enough to know she wouldn't kick you to the curb." Again, Marceline scratched her neck, trying her quickest to accumulate a false hood. "If im being honest im avoiding Keila. I know she won't have anything good to say about me running away and all, but I'm a adult now, some shit I just have to figure out on my own." Bongo nodded softly, Guy speaking what was on his mind. "Well you should know us well enough to know that we're not gonna let you roam the streets without a place to sleep. Adult or not this place is dangerous Marcy, you need a place to crash." Marcy looked at him, a bit ashamed to be caught off guard at such instance. As much as she wanted to say no, Marcy didn't protest when Guy pulled himself out the passengers seat, opening the back door for Marcy, awaiting her presence inside the car. With a sigh, she obeyed, entering the backseat without a word. The car started and eased back onto the road. "You could crash at our place as long as you need man, no problem at all." Guy spouted. A weary thanks was all her recivied from Marceline. She didn't say much else the entire ride home.

Marceline didn't think she could every repay her friends for their kindness, even if it was just a spot on their couch. Atleast now she had some direction. Sleep and food were covered but the rest was up to her. She needed money, and fast. If she was really serious about her promise to Bonnibel, they were going to make a life for themselves, whether that be in their current location, or even a new state or town, and that required money. Not only would she be paying for a spot to stay, but all the necessities that came with raising a baby. Only 18 years old she was, and already had so much shit on her hands. She had accidentally murdered her ex boyfriend and ran away with her pregnant girlfriend. Oh how proud her mother would be. She could see her face now, sulking in sorrow at the actions of her daughter. Maybe it all would've been different if she were still alive. Maybe none of this would've happned. Maybe. Marceline ignored herself, melting into the warmth of the droplets that pelted her skin. The trio had filled up on microwaved pizza that had been in the fridge for a week, and departed separately to get ready and follow up on their plans. Bongo and Guy were headed to a party, and had invited Marceline along. Of course she accepted. Bonnibel had been on her mind since she left the trailer park, and the first step to her road of recovery was to get her out of her head. Marceline had put all of her self dependence on her lover, and if she wanted to get better, she needed to be able to pull through for herself. Bonnibel was the person she fell back on when she needed it, crawled to when she felt as if she amounted to nothing, her supplier of things she couldn't supply herself, and without her, she was starting to realise if she wanted to get better, she had to handle herself on her journey of development. With that, Marceline had welcomed the idea of letting loose at the party. It would be there her self dependency started. Pushing away those thoughts as well, Marceline finished up her business in the shower, allowing the water to graze her scalp and wash away the suds that lingered on her skin. Swiftly, she stepped out and dried herself with the towel supplied by Bongo. She stepped ahead of the mirror, examining her body for the first time in a while. Her skin now clean she was able to examine the imprints on herself. On her throat loitered the healing purple outline of the hands that once clasped around her neck. Flashbacks came associated with that catch, but not all of them so bad. The same place where she was choked senseless was a burial ground for the lost kisses of her lover. All those nights spent molded together under her duvet, her lips attached softly to her neck, hands grasping her waist and- "Marceline! You done in there dude?" "Uh yeah just about! Give me a minute!" Marceline spurred from the bathroom, taking Guy's call as a que to speed up her dressing. Quickly Marceline pushed her thoughts aside and dressed in the clothes packed in her bag. Ripped jeans and a oversized band tee. Opening the door she greeted by her friends perched near the door, keys in hand. Without second thought, she joined them outside and in the car.

(PLAY SONG HERE)
Marceline had split at their arrival of the party. She informed both boys she came with that she'll catch up with them later. She didn't want to be a burden to their fun with their personal friends so she split by herself. Marcy didn't know anybody in the party but that didn't stop her from looking for some fun. As loud as the music was she enjoyed it for it's sole purpose of taking up silence. She didn't like the silence so much, it made her think, and that made her head hurt, so to have the music filling her ears to the brim was much of a delight. Past the dancing bodies that mingled in a pack on the empty space in the living room, the couples with lips glued together producing nasty sounds in the walking spaces, and groups of wall flowers who glued to the side lines sipping their drink watching everyone else have fun, Marceline made it to the couch, not before grabbing a beer from the counter. She settled in on the cusion, pressing the rim of the bottle to her lips and allowing as much beer as she could swallow flow through her parted lips. She just wanted to forget everything for one night, feel as if she owned the world, and that was exactly what she was doing. It seemed the kid seated next to her took notice. His eyes were practically mantled to the side of her face he was staring so hard. Marceline swigged the last bit of sour liquid and turned to face him. "What? Is there something on my face?" The gruff looking boy pulled a hum, followed by a chuckle. "Nope. I just couldn't help notice how fast you were downing that. Looking for a stong effect?" Marceline sank deeper into the couch. "I guess you could say that." "Well." The boy sat up, darting his eyes around their surroundings. "I have something that could hit alot harder and quicker." Stuffing his hand into his pocket, he jerked up a small plastic baggie with two pills settled in the middle. Marceline eyed the bag suspiciously. "I haven't seen you around here before so I'll charge you 30." Marceline deadpaned. She only had a little money left from their bus trip, nothing more than 40 dollars, but would this be the right way to spend it? Yes.

The room was no longer the same way she saw it in her sober eyes, nothing but loud music and sweaty teen dancing. In her state of mind it was magical. The music wavered in and out of her ears, making it sound chopped and screwed in her head, increasing her daze to a extent. In the crowd she was swallowed up, mouth pulled open in awe about how their bodies swayed so effortlessly, almost as if they had no bones. The smoke fizzed in the air and merged with the bright lights produced from the machine, acting as some sort of mystical fog encaputring her in a feeling of daze. It was at that moment that all the weight that ever perched on her shoulders had slid off and down to the floor. Sure the two pills and a beer were going to leave a massive hangover in the morning but she felt the best she's had since her departure from her lover. Worry free, she danced in the moment. Laughing, head thrown back, her body merged as one with the music. For once she didn't mind the circumstances, she was having to much of a good time to do so. Foggy haze, blaring music, colorful lights, she let the night consume her.