Innocent

Nightmares

Bri's POV:

"No!!! Please don't!!!"
It seems like I've been fighting for my life every single day. Every time I try to get escape something keeps pulling me back and it's like I can never win. I relive the same dream all the time but a few things change sometimes.
"You don't have to do this." I keep saying over and over. I thought that'll work but nope, they kept reaching for my clothes. "You better shut your fat ass up or you'll be swallowing your teeth!!!" One of the guys said. So I just kept my mouth closed and cried. "Which one of y'all want to go first?" The short dude asked. "I'll go first." The tall dude said excitingly. He started taking off his pants and walked closer to me trying to get my pants off, so I started to kick him, not caring about the consequences, this is my virginity we're talking about. I guess that pissed him off that I was putting up a fight, so he grabbed me by my hair and banged it against the wall. Next thing I know I was seeing stars and my eyes were slowly closing.

I woke up and seen blood on the floor, where I once laid, then I turned my head to look around and my head started pounding instantly. It feels like I've been hit in the head with a metal baseball bat. I tried to get up, going where the bed was but my legs gave out as soon as I got up. All I could think about is, Will this ever be over. I positioned myself to work my body won't hurt as much.
"Let me out!!! Please, I want to go home!!!"
I yelled. "Please let me out!!!" I yelled again. Next think I know I felt myself shaking. The shaking continue for about 30 seconds and that's when my eyes shot open.

(Nightmare Over)
"Bri, wake up! Wake up!" My mom said shaking me, as tears rolled down her face. I couldn't really speak, I just was looking at her speechless. "Are you okay honey?" My mom asked, still with tears threatening to fall from her eyes at any moment.
"I'm fine, it was just a bad dream." I said putting my head down. "I think we should get you some help." She said in a soothing tone. "That sounds like a good idea." I said to my mom.

3 Months Later...

I'm starting to slowly feel like myself day by day. I've been seeing a therapist for the past 2 1/2 months and she's helped me with a lot of stuff. I know I won't ever be the same Bri that I used to be, but I can try to at least feel normal again.

I am now 8 months pregnant, and I now know the gender of both babies. I'm having 2 girls, I already had a feeling that I was having girls anyway. Everyone is so excited about my pregnancy, they keep sending congratulatory cards & gifts. Speaking of gifts my mom is throwing me a baby shower next week, I can't wait.

My doctor put me on bedrest until I have the girls, and honestly I've been so bored just sitting and laying down all day. Old friends visit here and there but truthfully I have let that part of my life go. I'm moving on trying to better my life for my girls. The only person I still honestly talk to is Jill. Yes she knows I only want a friendship from her and nothing more, plus I'm not really ready for a relationship right now anyway, considering everything that's going on in my life right now, I can tell she still has really strong feelings but she's respecting my wishes. She even came to celebrate my 17th birthday with me last month. We just had a small dinner at my parents house, just the my family and the people who have been supporting and helping me during this crazy stage of my life. It was nice, simply, and elegant.
While on bed rest I've had a lot of time to think about my life. I've been thinking about becoming a nurse. I've been finishing high school online at home obviously. This is my last year and I just want it to be over already. And speaking of things being over, I cannot wait until the nightmares are completely over. I mean I only have them once a week now, that's a big improvement from once a day, that's why I'm thankful for my mom getting me a therapist. I know things like this take time, but I'm tired of waiting for things to get better, my life for past year and a half has been nothing but a total nightmare, and I'm just over it.