I'm Sorry (not a chapter)

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I'm sorry for not updating in a while. I know I'm really shitty at updating.

I'm going to go on a little rant really quick. You don't need to read this. It's just me ranting about the shit in my life. Trigger warning I guess.




I don't know what the fuck to do anymore. I want to die so fucking bad and I can't cope anymore. I've been clean of self harm for 4 months and by the time I've uploaded this, that's gone. I'm so fucking sick of going in and out of the mental hospital constantly cause I can't fucking deal with my own shit. If I entirely stop updating than that probably means I'm gone and I finally did it right. I am broken beyond repair at this point. The ptsd won't fucking go away and no matter how many medications I take it's not enough. Today marks five years since the first time I attempted suicide and I'm genuinely considering putting the nail in the coffin for real this time.


If you read that then sorry. If I don't do something stupid than I'll try and update soon. Don't worry about me. I know this is some really random bullshit. Sorry for making you read all that.

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