Rant ~Yato x Reader AU~

Chapter 22: The Heart's Failure

It's been a long while since I've worn this.

The locket that Kaito got me, that is. It's been so long since I've worn it. Hell, it's been a while since I've even last seen it. But here I am...wearing it. It's strange, really. It feels so foreign and strange. The golden chain brushes against my skin, causing chills to dart the length of my spine. I guess my flesh had grown accustomed to not having anything against it. Then again, it could be the small heft of the locket pulling at the chain that keeps attracting my attention.

The locket. It's a rather simplistic piece of jewelry with a beautiful golden heart-shaped pendant that shimmers in the light. It's nothing extravagant or over-the-top, but it's still special. After all, it is a gift that Kaito had given me shortly before...before it all went to hell.

I wrap my fingers around the trinket and squeeze my eyes shut. I don't really wanna think about the bad. I tell myself, swallowing a hard lump down. Think happy thoughts. Think about happy things -like Kaito's smile. The once present hellish images of them become replaced by the sweet view of my memory's recollection of Kaito and his million-dollar smile.

He always had such a warm and beautiful smile. If I was having a bad day, all I needed was to see that smile and suddenly all my problems would disappear. Just poof and all was good. That was the kind of power his gentle smile held. It was such a powerful and heartwarming trait he had.

To be honest, I'm sure he still holds that ability. I'm certain that he still flashes that toothy grin and it melts the hearts of any near him. And, I'll be honest, I'm slightly jealous for them. I am envious of any women that get to see his smile now. It's pathetic, really. Dwelling on him, that is. After all, it's been three years. Three whole years. I'm sure he's moved on. I'm certain that he has found someone new. That's only natural. But I haven't.

I'm honestly not sure if I'll ever truly move on. I mean, it's stupid. To be this hung up on one single guy. Who am I kidding? I'm talking about Kaito as if he's just some guy when he is definitely not that. He is the first guy I ever loved. I was serious about him. We were planning a future together. But I was sixteen and stupid and he was seventeen and ambitious. Still, I can't shake this feeling.

"I see you're here once again," Mr. Sui's voice says, interrupting my thoughts.

I glance up, watching as he approaches me, the wind running her fingers through his hair. He takes steady strides, reaching me as his eyes remained trained on the ocean's horizon.

"You appear troubled," he continues, stuffing his hands into his coat's pockets. "Is everything alright? You called in sick today. That's unlike you."

I fidget with the locket and swallow, "Sorry about that, Mr. Sui. It's just -"

"Relax, Y/N," he smiles. "Mental wellbeing is just as important as physical wellbeing. Neither is more important than the other." He pauses for a moment before continuing, "So, what has you troubled?"

I turn my gaze to the view ahead. "It's nothing and stupid. Really, you don't need to worry, Mr. Sui."

"Stupid?" he repeats quizzically. "Something that is troubling you is not stupid. If it makes you feel down, then it is justified."

I glimpse over at him. Sincerity fills his eyes as it often does. Honestly, even being near Mr. Sui can be calming. There is just a soothing aura about him. Wise, kind, and genuine, always willing to offer a hint of wisdom. Just like a wise and caring grandfather figure.

I dig my own hands into my pockets and sigh, "Maybe. I don't know. It feels stupid."

"Well, how about you try to tell me, and I'll be the judge of that?" he offers, flashing another friendly smile.

"Okay," I nod, trying to flash my own smile. "Alright. Back during the festival, I...I saw someone that I know. Well, knew."

"Someone you knew?" he questions.

"Yeah," I reply. "He was a guy I went to high school with."

I can already feel the lump trying to form in my throat. Tears are already threatening to gloss over my eyes, but I fight them. I refuse to let them spill. I refuse to cry in front of my landlord/boss. Refuse to do that. So, I swallow it all down.

However, Mr. Sui must notice my slight hesitation because he says, "Seems seeing this young man has upset you greatly. Is it safe to assume that you two were more than friends?"

I just nod in response.

He continues, "I see. The heart fails to move on, sometimes. It is blinded by its incapability to not feel those familiar feelings. All it knows is how to love. It is horrible with distancing itself from those emotions and the people associated with them." He pauses for a moment, taking a hefty breath, "I know my own heart fails to acknowledge the reality. It's been fifteen years and it still flutters whenever I think about her."

This catches my attention. "Fifteen years? If I may ask, Mr. Sui...fifteen years since what?"

The older gentleman brings his gaze to mine, his lips pressed in a flat line. He seems to be weighing whether or not to entertain my question, I assume. I mean, that's what I would do. However, Mr. Sui just glances back to the ocean and swallows.

He breathes, "It's been fifteen years since my wife passed away."

**Ello my sweet lovelies! Feels good to be typing again. Took a few days off to recharge and I'm happy I did. It was just the little break I needed. That said, did you expect that response from Mr. Sui? Hope y'all are ready for what awaits! As always, thank you so much for everything! Y'all are the bee's knees! Stay groovy! Wuv yous!! <3**

-Noel Ross